Frank Klaune's definitions

skunk piss

Any low quality, generic, substandard, crappy tasting, lousy beer or booze.

Frank threw a party last weekend. It was a good time except for the skunk piss the bartender was serving. I got all pissed up at the party and got even with him. First I did an upper deck in his john, then I did a Cleveland Rewind and on my way out, I did a technicolor yawn on his living room floor. Frank is such an idiot!

by Frank Klaune June 24, 2006

test fart

When you are in a social / public situation and have the urge to pass a considerable amount of gas. If it has been a long time since your last fart, you are unsure of:

1) The sound level (volume) of the fart
2) The smell level (stench) of the fart

... so you let out a small amount of the fart in a discreet fashion- thus you have let a test fart.

Frank was in church the other day and had to fart really bad. He said he intended to let a test fart but instead of a squibbler, it turned out to be a blastus and he wound up shitting his pants in the middle of the sermon. Damn, what an idiot!

by Frank Klaune April 14, 2005

barn drop

An unusual athletic maneuver used for excretion. The "barn dropper" shimmies up the stall wall in a public restroom with a high ceiling. With one foot on top of each side wall and the pants dropped, the barn dropper lets go with the dump. A successful barn drop results in the target (the toilet) sucessfully hit. The barn drop is a common tactic in men's dormitories and frat houses across the USA and often done in the presence of a large, loud drunken crown of well wishers and spectators.

"Damn, the other night we got back to the frat. I heard all this commotion, and there was a huge crowd at the party chanting while Jack was doing a barn drop. He missed the target. The janitor resigned the next day."

by Frank Klaune March 7, 2004

Harry Palmer

The protagonist of K.J. Rowling's book. This ignorant teenage zitfaced twit received international acclaim for his masturbatory tendencies.

Man, did you read Rowling's latest Harry Palmer book?

by Frank Klaune November 13, 2004

lipstick on your dipstick

Does this really need an explanation? It seems to be used primarily when lecherous drunks are sitting at a bar and a hot bitch walks in.

(Drunks talking in a bar as the hot bitch walks in)...

"Damn, Frank. Check out what just came in the door! Man.... How'd you like to get her lipstick on your dipstick?"

by Frank Klaune January 27, 2005

in the tank

Broken, hopeless, ruined. Synonyms: screwed up or fucked up.

Damn! Frank was going to have a big outdoor barbecue this weekend but when the forecast called for rain, he knew his plans were in the tank.

Frank started his car, depressed the accelerator to the floor and shifted back and forth between "R" and "D". Now his transmission is in the tank.

by Frank Klaune April 29, 2005

quim and tonic

Humorous mismangulation of "gin and tonic". The term indicates a high degree of drunkenness followed by sex with a woman. It seems to specifically imply a man who is highly drunk performing oral sex on a woman. The tonic may, or may not be drank while performing the oral sex.

Damn, I wondered where Frank went at the party, so I walked out to the porch. He was so damn drunk out there with some chick on the porch swing. She was moaning out loud as he was getting some quim and tonic.

by Frank Klaune April 16, 2005