Frank Klaune's definitions

blue streak

Igniting one's own fart. It really does work. The typical "blue streak" is done with the farter sitting on the floor, legs in the air, and holding a bic lighter to the anus while farting violently. It is highly recommended that some sort of clothing be worn when this is done- not only to keep y ou from scorching your anus but also to keep you from shitting all over your friend's lighter.

Damn, Frank did a blue streak the other day. The fire ball was about a foot long!

by Frank Klaune January 27, 2005

donger

How do you explain it? When playing golf, each of the guys tees off, plays the fairway and finishes with a final putt. The scorekeeper then tallies everyone's score for that hole. The person with the highest (worst) score for that hole must play the entire next hole with their penis protruding from their pants. Thus, the loser of that hole is "the donger".

Man, Frank sucks at golf. He was the donger so much last week he sunburned his dick!

by Frank Klaune May 28, 2004

chappies

An irritated or inflamed anal area. "The chappies" is a condition somewhat like hemorrhoids but on a more temporary basis. Chappies are usually caused by excessive ass wiping due to having the shits or by excessive moist farts causing a sore, irritated anal region.

"Damn, Frank's food was so greasy I had the shits all day. Now I've got the chappies so bad I can hardly sit down!"

by Frank Klaune March 6, 2004

leakatorium

Slang for the restroom or WC. The term is a more polite version of "pissalorium" suitable for use in mixed audiences. It makes you appear highly intelligent and sophisticated as if you know Latin, when in reality, you think it's a language spoken in Latvia.

Ladies, excuse me. I must attend the leakatorium.

by Frank Klaune January 26, 2005

nut rot

Term pertaining to the deleterious effect of the sweat from your nut sack upon surrounding tissue and material. Nut rot causes your underwear to prematurely fail in the crotch area immediately beside where your sack rides. Nut rot becomes visible as a tan or brown stain in the area where your crotch is on the inside of the underwear. Next, the seam and the stretchy elastic gives way and eventually the entire crotch area of the underwear gives out and your nuts hang out from beneath your underwear in the area where the underwear material used to be. Nut rot also affects the skin of the crotch in cases where a person uses poor hygiene and / or lack of bathing or showering. See crotch rot.

Damn, when Frank was on the campout, his nards hung out of his skivvies. He must have major nut rot in his tighty whities.

by Frank Klaune April 22, 2005

fucknob

1) A contemptible person of low intelligence.
2) A term of endearment for a person who has just done you wrong.
3) Relating a contemptible person to a sexual device in such a way as to equate such low intelligence with an inanimate object of gratification (i.e. a head with no brains).

"Oh you fucknob! You just ran into my car!"

"That Frank... he's one colossal fucknob!"

by Frank Klaune November 5, 2003

drug monster

Another common Tomism with humorous implications, "drug monster" refers to a person whose personality is higly changeable through use of drugs. It also refers to one who uses a large quantity of drugs and implies a dependence on such drugs.

Frank took a speedball, two hits off the bong, an LSD cube and a 'lude. Man, he is one drug monster!

by Frank Klaune February 13, 2005