Figleaf23's definitions

balloon dance

A burlesque performance involving a dancer garbed in an outfit comprised of balloons. As the dance proceeds, audience members are invited to pop the balloons, eventually revealing the dancer's nudity

We watched the balloon dancer for a while, and eventually discovered she was not a natural blond.

by Figleaf23 January 14, 2009

pissaster

to have a urination go really bad for whatever reason. Includes spraying urine everywhere because you tried to piss with a chubby, or having your urine shoot out at one or more 90degree angles due to being gum shut, or any other bad thing happening when you're taking a piss.

Combines 'piss' and 'disaster'.

Dude1: What the fuck happened in the bathroom?
Dude2: It was dark and the lid was down -- a classic recipe for pissaster.
Dude1: Well fuck, clean it up!

by Figleaf23 January 1, 2009

koan

a parable combined with a riddle, most commonly associated with the teaching of Zen buddhism. A koan confronts the student with a seemingly impenetrable question which is only resolved when through acheiving a deeper understanding of the philosophical point being taught.

One of the most famous koans is "What is the sound of one hand clapping?"

by Figleaf23 December 9, 2008

cunt grab

an unfortunately coarse term for the totally non-violent erotic art of inserting one or more fingers into a woman's vagina and then gently closing the hand a few degrees so the palm can stimulate the clitoral area. Very pleasurable for the recipient if done correctly. Done with either the thumb or fingers, depending on your respective directions/facing.

Synonym: box grab
Contrast: pussy-grab

Guy: So dude, d'ja hookup at the party?
Other Guy: Word, dude. I made out with Becky for a while and when I got her panties off I gave her the cunt grab. After a few minutes of that she let me do anything I wanted.

by Figleaf23 August 12, 2007

bombed

a special state of inebriation in which privileged members of society can go unbothered by the authorities

Police Officer: Do you realize you were going 100 in a 50 zone?

Rich Drunk: Sorry, officer, but I'm BOMBED!

Police Officer: Oh, okay sir. Drive carefully.

by Figleaf23 January 14, 2009

murphy bed

a built-in bed that folds up into the wall of a room.

Comedian: My first apartment was so small ...
Audience: How small was it?
Comedian: My first apartment was so small the mice had to have murphy beds.

by Figleaf23 December 16, 2008

pome

pronounced "pomm-ee"

Originally an acronym for the status of inmates sent to Australia: 'Prisoner of Mother England'.

At first used by the English to describe Australians (as anyone Australian must, obviously, have come from prison), now in a strange refersal used by Australians to designate anyone from England.

"Oid loik ta waelcum tha pome baastud ta god's awn eu-uth, and ta remoind him we deown't loik stack-ap sticky beeks reound hee."

by Figleaf23 January 1, 2009