Figleaf23's definitions

habberdashery

men's clothing store

I needed a new tie, so I went to a habberdashery and spoke to the habberdasher. Meanwhile, my wife needed a new hat, so she went to the milinery.

by Figleaf23 June 2, 2007

balloon dance

A burlesque performance involving a dancer garbed in an outfit comprised of balloons. As the dance proceeds, audience members are invited to pop the balloons, eventually revealing the dancer's nudity

We watched the balloon dancer for a while, and eventually discovered she was not a natural blond.

by Figleaf23 January 14, 2009

testilying

telling lies under oath; standard operating procedure for police officers acting as witnesses in trials.

See also: perjury

The story the cops gave was so ridiculous that everyone except the judge knew they were testilying.

by Figleaf23 February 26, 2009

3 dressed up as a 9

on a scale of one to ten, a woman who actually would rate a three presenting superficially as if she were a nine.

"Well you can say what you like
Be what you wanna be
You can suit yourself, baby
But you don't suit me

You're just a 3 dressed up as a 9,
you're only wasting my time."

-Trooper

by Figleaf23 January 1, 2009

Liquor? I don't even know her!

A tired old gag line to say whenever someone says the word 'liquor'.

Drinkin' Man 1: "Hey, let's go get some liquor!"
Drinkin' Man 2: "Liquor? I don't even know her!"

by Figleaf23 September 18, 2007

koan

a parable combined with a riddle, most commonly associated with the teaching of Zen buddhism. A koan confronts the student with a seemingly impenetrable question which is only resolved when through acheiving a deeper understanding of the philosophical point being taught.

One of the most famous koans is "What is the sound of one hand clapping?"

by Figleaf23 December 9, 2008

pissaster

to have a urination go really bad for whatever reason. Includes spraying urine everywhere because you tried to piss with a chubby, or having your urine shoot out at one or more 90degree angles due to being gum shut, or any other bad thing happening when you're taking a piss.

Combines 'piss' and 'disaster'.

Dude1: What the fuck happened in the bathroom?
Dude2: It was dark and the lid was down -- a classic recipe for pissaster.
Dude1: Well fuck, clean it up!

by Figleaf23 January 1, 2009