El ritardo's definitions

Painting some sea dragons

A rather obscure term for wanking. Supposedly originated in Australia.

When they asked me about why I put ‘painting some sea dragons’ on my resume, I told them it was part of the scholastic art competition.

by El ritardo April 17, 2020

roll in the gay

See roll in the hay. Similar, but homosexual.

Ish! Them Koreans roll in the gay all night, that shit sickens my stomach.

by El ritardo July 1, 2018

Surfer Thoughts

Philosophies often thought up by stoned surfers that sit in the back of the shop waxing the boards.

(Surfer thoughts because this bullshit needs to include the word being defined) Dude, aren’t beds like, shelves for your body when you’re not using it?

by El ritardo June 1, 2019

penis popper party

The after-party of the pride parade.

Bill, a straight dude who volunteered for the parade, accidentally fell victim to butt stuff at the penis popper party.

by El ritardo June 25, 2018

Green Bay Fudge Packer

A sexual act, where one partner toasts cheddar on their penis/strap on, and gives the other a hard ass fudge packing.

Brett favre had always had a kink for the Green Bay fudge packer.

by El ritardo July 2, 2018

Slurp Juice

One of countless terms for purple drank.

Sipped a big gulp slurp juice earlier, now I feel like I want to throw up.

by El ritardo July 19, 2018

Iffy Stiffy

When your viagra is a dud, and you get blue-balled hardcore.

Tyson got an iffy stiffy last night, and he’s been sad ever since.

by El ritardo June 24, 2018