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Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Bald Dog

A bald, floppy, semi-flaccid penis. Usually the post nut, semi-chub.
She kept on wanking my bald dog after I blew nut.

I thought I was home alone but my mom walked in on me sporting a bald dog.

My uncle asked me if I had ever seen a bald dog.
by Eaton Holgoode October 15, 2018
mugGet the Bald Dogmug.

Stainless Steel Sink

A chick with braces with her mouth wide open to take hot load.
Dude, does your girl still give you head now that she has braces? Hell yea. Now I just drop my oyster in her stainless steel sink.
by Eaton Holgoode June 9, 2009
mugGet the Stainless Steel Sinkmug.

Spicy Jackhammer

An extremely rough and vigorous hand job performed by your partner that is akin to a jackhammer like hand action. The element that makes it spicy is receiving this highly pleasurable act while watching a Sean Spicer press conference which adds to the anger filled intensity and roughnes and absolute pounding of both the cock and balls with every full stroke.
My grapes are so swollen and sore today braaahhh. I can hardly walk.

What gives?

Carmen and I were watching the recent press conference and the handy she was giving me turned into a spicy jackhammer. I don't agree with the policies but man that was hell of a hand job.
by Eaton Holgoode March 1, 2017
mugGet the Spicy Jackhammermug.

Wet Tug

Giving yourself a feverish, orgasmic wank job in the shower, pool, lake or other body of water.
Carl woke with a rigid case of morning wood. Rather than rubbing one out in bed, he hopped in the shower for a wet tug.

Dan was swimming at his grandma's assisted living center pool and the geriatric water aerobics class was too much to watch so he swam to the deep end for a quick wet tug.
by Eaton Holgoode January 8, 2016
mugGet the Wet Tugmug.

Gambler’s Old Fashioned

Intentionally getting an old fashioned (hand job) in risky situations and places where the likelihood of being caught is extremely high and risky. The thrill of gambling with getting caught combined with the physical pleasure of a vigorous handy is intoxicating.
Rachel was picking out bananas with one hand and giving me a gambler’s old fashioned with the other in the produce isle at the Walmart.

I shot my custard all over the blackboard in class just before the bell. That gambler’s old fashioned is incredible.

I’m pretty sure the drive thru chick at Starbucks realized I was getting a gambler’s old fashioned when Rachel was ordering a vanilla latte.
by Eaton Holgoode November 1, 2018
mugGet the Gambler’s Old Fashionedmug.

Analysis Paralysis

Analysis Paralysis is the total inability to reach a decision. Found often in the business and corporate setting. Usually a condition caused by nit picking managers and owners. The primary source is management/owner requests for more information, reports, studies, statistics, evaluations, opinion, and research on a subject. All of this requested research and study is accompanied by endless, mindless, discussions in multiple meetings regarding the subject and the compiled information. The end result is no decision is made because the efforts placed to garner information and hold endless meetings and discussions are viewed a progress on the subject matter.
Hey did management ever decide if we were going to get extra donuts on donut day? Are you kidding me? They spent $2,000 on a cost analysis, accounting is still crunching cost figures and they have been discussing it for 9 months. It is in the company's usual state of total analysis paralysis.
by Eaton Holgoode June 16, 2009
mugGet the Analysis Paralysismug.

Egg Tuck

When you are hitting her doggy and she reaches under and tucks your man eggs into her snatch.
I busted my nut in ten seconds after Rachel did the egg tuck last night.
by Eaton Holgoode June 12, 2018
mugGet the Egg Tuckmug.

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