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Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Jack Balling

Vigorously yanking down on the scrotum with one hand while jerking off the cock with the other. Typically performed in synchronous harmony until a climactic finishing release.
My balls are really sore today. I watched porn all day in my dorm room and was jack balling myself.
by Eaton Holgoode April 26, 2017
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Moose Bell

1. A deposit of skin hanging from the neck if a bull moose.

2. An excessively large and dangling male scrotum.
1. Shot a bull moose last week hunting in Alaska. Thing has a huge moose bell.

2. Frank's moose bell was too much for his girlfriend to gag down when he tea bagged her.
by Eaton Holgoode January 20, 2017
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Spacey Cadet

Young male that is hit on and actively pursued for a little male on male sex.
This bar is full of Spacey cadets.

This acting class is great. But I don’t want to be a spacey cadet.
by Eaton Holgoode October 30, 2017
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Assballz

A rank, cheesy, sweaty smell of ripe ass and sticky ball sack that is found around the gooch and taint. However, may be used to just imply one smells of ass and balls.
I just scratched my taint and now my finger smells like assballz.

She was licking my gooch but gagged cause it smelled of assballz.

Dude go shower. You smell like assballz.
by Eaton Holgoode January 30, 2018
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Wet Eggs

Dropping greasy, wet shits. Typically hangover shits.
I was in the stall for an hour laying some wet eggs. I feel like hell.
by Eaton Holgoode May 4, 2018
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Dab Towel

A cum rag. Any material used to wipe up semen and vaginal juice after sex. Can be a sock, underwear, curtain, sheet or cloth.
After busting his nut, Dana cleaned up her boyfriend's goo by using the end of the new curtains her mom had just installed as a dab towel.
by Eaton Holgoode November 15, 2015
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Fifth Bedpost

Reference to a male’s stiff, rigid cock while in bed.
I rode the fifth bedpost last night. I’m sore.

I broke in our new canopy bed with a ride of the fifth bedpost last night.

He invited me back to his room and introduced me to the fifth bedpost.
by Eaton Holgoode April 21, 2018
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