Dr. Heywood R. Floyd's definitions

Pet Shop Boys

Postmodern ironists cloaked behind a veil of buoyantly melodic and lushly romantic synthpop confections.

These lyrics are actually intelligent. It must be Pet Shop Boys.

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd October 28, 2013

hagiography

the biography of a saint, or (sarcastically) an overly-fawning biography. A puff-piece.

That was no expose'. That was a hagiography.

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd April 7, 2007

sailfrog

a frog that has been run over by so many cars that it's flat. You can pick it up and throw it like a Frisbee and it will sail.

Look! A sailfrog! I wanna sail it!

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd January 12, 2008

calculata

what twins Paul and Aiden wanted more than anything for Christmas.

(from an SNL sketch starring John Malkovich.)

Ma. Ma. Ma. Ma. Are we getting a calculata? I'm gonna add so many numbas.

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd February 14, 2009

Jesum Crow!

A bastardization of the exclamation "Jesus Christ!" but less vulgar.

Jesum Crow! I dropped one of my diamonds in the macaroni!

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd April 25, 2008

moistmaker

an extra slice of gravy-soaked bread inside a turkey sandwich to make it extra moist. Monica on "Friends" invented it and Ross named it. Ross got really upset one time, when his boss ate his sandwich with a moistmaker.

Ross: Oh-oh really? Did you confuse it with your own turkey sandwich with a moistmaker?

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd December 25, 2007

grottie

a girl who is gross, but a hottie. She burps, farts, scratches her butt and when she picks her nose or ears yells, "Jackpot!"

Particularly desirable as a girlfriend as she's hot... and being gross herself, she can never be disgusted with you because she is disgusting herself.

Marry her.

You hit the jackpot, brotha! You’ve got a girlfriend who can never get on your case for being disgusting because she’s even more disgusting. Sonny is gross and a hottie. She’s a Grottie!

by Dr. Heywood R. Floyd August 20, 2010