3 definitions by Dr. Paine

A company founded in 1953 by Cave Johnson, originally to create shower curtains for the U.S. Military, but went in a different direction after Johnson went insane from mercury poisoning. Most notable works include the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device, and the supercomputer GLaDOS. Considered a rival to Black Mesa.
Aperture Science.

We do what we must, because we can.
by Dr. Paine July 19, 2009
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1. The best friend you will ever have.

2. A three dimensional object, made up of six squares.
1. Who needs friends when you have a cube?

2. The tissue box is in a cube shape.
by Dr. Paine August 17, 2009
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Aperture Science's greatest creation, the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System; or GLaDOS, is a super computer with an 'infinite capacity for knowledge' who runs the Aperture Science Computer-Aided Enrichment Center.

GLaDOS' personality is made up by four 'cores'- spheres loaded with data that instill a sense of curiosity, morality, logic (or, alternatively, cake or memory), and anger into her system. The Morality core is notorious for failing, or being blocked, allowing her to go on rampages that end in the death of Aperture Science employees (by way of deadly neurotoxic gas), and run insane tests for the good of all of us.
GLaDOS will never value your safety over your unique ideas and creativity.
by Dr. Paine August 17, 2009
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