David Blomstrom's definitions

Microslug

One of many nicknames for Microsoft, this one hinting at the bureaucratic inertia and bloated code it has become famous for; generally synonymous with Microsloth.

Will Microslug release another Windows upgrade in our lifetime, or is Vista the end of the Road Ahead?

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007

Hugo Chavez

Hugo Chavez is a charismatic, strong-willed and courageous political reformer who, as President of Venezuela, has probably done more to fight corporate corruption, promote socialism and unite Latin America against its traditional enemy, the United States, than any other living person.

Wouldn't it be great if Hugo Chavez would turn his guns on George W. Bush's friend and benefactor, software terrorist Bill Gates, inspiring some blowback in the form of a Latin American Microsoft boycott that could spread around the world?

by David Blomstrom April 18, 2008

Darth Gates

A nickname for Micro$oft founder Bill Gates, a key member of the Seattle Mafia and global asshole.

Has Darth Gates blackM$ailed any schools in your country yet?

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007

Virus Magnet

Any software program with poor security, applied especially to software produced by Microsoft.

M$ Windows has been described as a virus magnet held together with a bit of software program and made functional with occasional downloaded service packs.

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007

Microslave

A person who is duped or coerced into using Microsoft software.

Millions of Microslaves could win their freedom if they'd just get a Mac.

by David Blomstrom October 19, 2007

Freedomware

Any quality software, whether commercial or freeware, that offers an alternative to Microsoft or other corrupt corporations; especially open source software.

A Mac running on Apple's Mac OS X operating system and loaded with Adobe's Creative Suite (with Dreamweaver and Photoshop), both Firefox and Opera web browsers (along with Safari, which is pre-installed) and a variety of open source software is the most awesome combination of freedomware on the planet.

by David Blomstrom May 22, 2008

Microsoft

1. official name of one of the world's most powerful and corrupt corporations, increasingly known as Microshaft, Microshit, Mickeysoft or simply M$<br>
2. corporation known for making unbelievably crappy software, then shoving it down consumers' throats, screwing competitors and taxpayers and exploiting public school students in the process<br>
3. corporation founded by Bill Gates and Paul Allen, two of the world's richest assholes and virtual monarchs of the corporate brothel called Seattle<br>
4. mega-corporation that can't handle real competition
5. powerful member of the Seattle Mafia

If it weren't for software bug fixes and virus advice, Microsoft's website traffic might slow to a crawl.

by David Blomstrom May 22, 2006