Darkness Prime's definitions

Super Mario Galaxy

The BEST Super Mario Game, EVER. Such a simple concept, Mario/Luigi in space, and yet it works SO DAMN WELL! Definitely a must-play. Great music, awesome level design, good controls (probably the best underwater controls for ANY Mario game), breathtaking environments (Comet Observatory, anyone?), cool new power-ups, and best of all... motherfucking Rosalina! How can anyone hate this fucking game?

I just beat Super Mario Galaxy as both Mario AND Luigi. Moving on to the Grand Finale Galaxy!

by Darkness Prime February 24, 2023

The Boy Who Lived

Everyone points to Harry Potter. But… there is ONE other definition… me. Why?

Well, let’s observe two historical points of my life…

1995: My mother was tragically killed in a car accident.

2012: I was hit by a car, but… I survived with merely a broken shin.,

Two vehicle accidents. The mother was killed, but the son surivived.

So in a way, that makes me…

The Boy Who Lived.

The Boy Who Lived is at large, continuing to create a legacy.

by Darkness Prime June 3, 2023

Ron DeSantis

Florida's equivalent of Lord Voldemort. His policies that target anything he claims is "woke" (which he can't even correctly define), with extra cruelty at the trans community. Gee... sounds an awful lot like Voldy's policies against Muggles, the Order of the Phoenix, and Muggle-Borns. Both of them get owned via their own arrogance (DeSantis got owned by Disney of all things!), and their defeats are equally amusing to watch.

Florida Voldemort... er, I mean Ron DeSantis... probably has Horcurxes stashed any somewhere. It certainly would explain his lack of humanity, his lack of empathy, and his cruelty toward anything and anyone he thinks is "woke,' whatever THAT means in his insane mind.

by Darkness Prime June 4, 2023

Rhinox

The Maximal in Beast Wars that is ALWAYS packing heat (those chainguns of doom), transforms into a rhino, and almost single-handedly overthrew Megatron after being turned into a Predacon once. Also once defeated Megatron… with a fart.

Megatron: Please, I come in peace.

Rhinox: Through a speaker You’re about to leave in pieces.

by Darkness Prime January 26, 2023

Lauren Boebert

Dillion Harper's doppleganger.

Lauren Boebert sure looks a lot like Dillion Harper. Sadly, Dillion Harper would be a better Congresswoman... she's more intelligent and is better at getting people BEHIND HER.

by Darkness Prime June 4, 2023

Culver's

The BEST fast food chain in existence. Butterburgers (my favorite is the mushroom & swiss + bacon), chicken (spicy chicken is SO DAMN GOOD), seafood (special shoutout to the Northern Atlantic Cod Fillet Sandwich for bringing me MANY foodgasms), and of course... the frozen custard (you MUST try the Georgia Peach, it's the stuff of legend). They are expanding, the goal is to reach all 50 states in the US. Lone live Culver's! Many thanks to the state of Wisconsin for bringing us this chain.

I went to Culver's, and had a meal of legend.

by Darkness Prime February 24, 2023

Marjorie Taylor Greene

A blonde, muggle Bellatrix Lestrange.

Has anyone not seen the connections? Marjorie Taylor Greene and Bellatrix Lestrange are both VERY loyal to a deranged man, would do anything for said man, and are somehow even crazier than the man they worship. Difference is the real world has misfortune of being stuck with one of them.

by Darkness Prime January 26, 2023