79 definitions by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT)
(britains government) can't run our country right, lent a lot of money 2 sum mexicans who can't pay it back and the whole country is in deep shit, house prices are going down and thousands of homes have been repossed, it's probably going 2 get 2 the point where everyone is living on the streets like hobos then whats the government going 2 do
person1: the government sucks, they are retards 4 lending that much money
person2: damm right ive lost my job because of money issues
person1: we will get them some day
person2: damm right ive lost my job because of money issues
person1: we will get them some day
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) July 22, 2009
person1: im gona give the dog a bone tonight
person2: like we all needed to know m8
person1: youve done it havent u
person2: ye
person1: exactly u told me you were gona do it
person2: like we all needed to know m8
person1: youve done it havent u
person2: ye
person1: exactly u told me you were gona do it
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) July 6, 2009
HOW THEY HAVE SEX
ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures.
ACTORS do it on cue.
ADVERTISERS use the "new, improved" method.
AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker.
ANSI does it in the standard way
ARCHEOLOGISTS like it old.
ARCHITECTS have great plans.
ARTISTS are exhibitionists.
ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over.
ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus.
ATTORNEYS make better motions.
AUDITORS like to examine figures.
BABYSITTERS charge by the hour.
BAILIFFS always come to order.
BAKERS knead it daily.
BAND MEMBERS play all night.
BANKERS do it with interest - penalty for early withdrawal.
BARBERS do it with shear pleasure.
BARTENDERS do it on the rocks.
BASEBALL PLAYERS make it to first base.
BASKETBALL PLAYERS score more often.
BEEKEEPERS like to eat their honey.
BEER BREWERS do it with more hops.
BEER DRINKERS get more head.
BICYCLISTS do it with 10 speeds.
BOOKKEEPERS do it with double entry.
BOSSES delegate the task to others.
BOWLERS have bigger balls.
BRICKLAYERS lay all day.
BRIDGE PLAYERS try to get a rubber.
BUS DRIVERS come early and pull out on time.
BUTCHERS have better meat.
C'Bers do it on the air.
CAMPERS do it in a tent.
CARPENTERS hammer it harder.
CARPET LAYERS do it on the floor.
CHEERLEADERS do it with more enthusiasm.
CHEMISTS like to experiment.
CHESS PLAYERS check their mates.
CHIROPRACTORS do it by manipulation.
CLOCK MAKERS do it mechanically.
CLOWNS do it for laughs.
COACHES whistle while they work.
COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it with bugs.
COCKTAIL WAITRESSES serve highballs.
COMPUTER GAME PLAYERS just can't stop.
COMPUTER OPERATORS get the most out of their software.
CONSTRUCTION WORKERS lay a better foundation.
CONSULTANTS tell other how to do it.
COPS have bigger guns.
COWBOYS handle anything horny.
COWGIRLS like to ride bareback.
CRANE OPERATORS have swinging balls.
CREDIT MANAGERS always collect.
DANCERS do it in leaps and bounds.
DEADHEADS do it with Jerry.
DEER HUNTERS will do anything for a buck.
DENTAL HYGIENISTS do it till it hurts.
DENTISTS do it in your mouth.
DETECTIVES do it under cover.
DIETICIANS eat better.
DIRECT MAILERS get it in the sack.
DIVERS do it deeper.
DOCTORS do it with patience.
DRUGGISTS fill your prescription.
DRUMMERS do it in 4/4 time.
DRY WALLER'S are better bangers.
ELECTRICIANS check your shorts.
ENGINEERS charge by the hour.
EXECUTIVES have large staffs.
FARMERS spread it around.
FIREMEN are always in heat.
FISHERMEN are proud of their rods.
FOOTBALL PLAYERS are measured by the yard.
FOUR-WHEELERS eat more bush.
FURRIERS appreciate good beaver.
GARBAGE MEN come once a week.
GARDENERS have 50 foot hoses.
GAS STATION ATTENDANTS pump all day.
GEOLOGISTS are great explorers.
GOLFERS do it in 18 holes.
GYMNASTS mount and dismount well.
HACKERS do it with fewer instructions.
HAIRDRESSERS give the best blow jobs.
HAM OPERATORS do it with frequency.
HANDYMEN like good screws.
HEWLETT PACKARD does it with precision.
HORSEBACK RIDERS stay in the saddle longer.
HUNTERS do it with a bang.
INSURANCE SALESMEN are premium lovers.
INTERIOR DECORATORS do it all over the house.
INVENTORS find a way.
JANITORS clean up afterwards.
JEWELERS mount real gems.
JOGGERS do it on the run.
LANDSCAPERS plant it deeper.
LAWYERS do it in their briefs.
LIBRARIANS do it quietly.
LOCKSMITHS can get into anything.
LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS last longer.
MACHINISTS make the best screws.
MAGICIANS are quicker than the eye.
MAINTENANCE MEN sweep 'em off their feet.
MANAGERS supervise others.
MARKETING REPs do it on commission.
MILKMEN deliver twice a week.
MILLIONAIRES pay to have it done.
MINERS sink deeper shafts.
MINISTERS do it on Sundays.
MISSILE MEN have better thrust.
MODELS do it in any position.
MODEM MANUFACTURERS do it with all sorts of characters.
MOTORCYCLISTS like something hot between their legs.
MOVIE STARS do it on film.
MUSICIANS do it with rhythm.
NONSMOKERS do it without huffing and puffing.
NURSES call the shots.
OCEANOGRAPHERS do it down under.
OPERATORS do it person-to-person.
OPTOMETRISTS do it face-to-face.
PAINTERS do it with longer strokes.
PARAMEDICS PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with a flash.
PHYSICISTS do it with uniform harmonic motion.
PILOTS keep it up longer.
PLUMBERS do it under the sink.
POLICEMEN like big busts.
POLITICIANS do it for 4 years then have to get re-erected.
POSTMEN come slower.
PRINTERS do it without wrinkling the sheets.
PRINTERS reproduce the fastest.
PROCTOLOGISTS do it in the end.
PROFESSORS do it by the book.
RACERS like to come in first.
RACQUETBALL PLAYERS do it off the wall..
RADIO and TV ANNOUNCERS broadcast it.
REAL ESTATE PEOPLE know all the prime spots.
RECYCLERS use it again.
REPAIRMEN can fix anything.
REPORTERS do it daily.
RESEARCHERS are still looking for it.
RETAILERS move their merchandise.
ROOFERS do it on top.
RUNNERS get into more pants.
SAILORS like to be blown.
SALESPEOPLE have away with their tongues.
SCIENTISTS discovered it.
SECRETARIES do it from 9 to 5.
SKYDIVERS are good till the last drop.
SOCCER PLAYERS have leather balls.
SPEECH PATHOLOGISTS are oral specialists.
SPELUNKERS do it underground.
SPORTSCASTERS like an instant replay.
STEWARDESSES do it in the air.
STUDENTS use their heads.
SURGEONS are smooth operators.
TAILORS make it fit.
TAXI DRIVERS do it all over town.
TAXIDERMISTS mount anything.
TELEPHONE CO. EMPLOYEES let their fingers do the walking.
TELLERS can handle all deposits and withdrawals.
TENNIS PLAYERS have fuzzy balls.
TRUCK DRIVERS have bigger dipsticks.
TRUCKERS carry bigger loads.
TYPISTS do it in triplicate.
VETERINARIANS are pussy lovers.
VOLLEYBALL PLAYERS keep it up.
WAITRESSES serve it piping hot.
WATER SKIERS come down harder.
WELDERS have hotter rods.
WRESTLERS know the best holds.
WRITERS have novel ways.
ZOOLOGISTS do it with animal instinct.
ACCOUNTANTS are good with figures.
ACTORS do it on cue.
ADVERTISERS use the "new, improved" method.
AMBULANCE DRIVERS come quicker.
ANSI does it in the standard way
ARCHEOLOGISTS like it old.
ARCHITECTS have great plans.
ARTISTS are exhibitionists.
ASSEMBLY LINE WORKERS do it over and over.
ASTRONOMERS do it with Uranus.
ATTORNEYS make better motions.
AUDITORS like to examine figures.
BABYSITTERS charge by the hour.
BAILIFFS always come to order.
BAKERS knead it daily.
BAND MEMBERS play all night.
BANKERS do it with interest - penalty for early withdrawal.
BARBERS do it with shear pleasure.
BARTENDERS do it on the rocks.
BASEBALL PLAYERS make it to first base.
BASKETBALL PLAYERS score more often.
BEEKEEPERS like to eat their honey.
BEER BREWERS do it with more hops.
BEER DRINKERS get more head.
BICYCLISTS do it with 10 speeds.
BOOKKEEPERS do it with double entry.
BOSSES delegate the task to others.
BOWLERS have bigger balls.
BRICKLAYERS lay all day.
BRIDGE PLAYERS try to get a rubber.
BUS DRIVERS come early and pull out on time.
BUTCHERS have better meat.
C'Bers do it on the air.
CAMPERS do it in a tent.
CARPENTERS hammer it harder.
CARPET LAYERS do it on the floor.
CHEERLEADERS do it with more enthusiasm.
CHEMISTS like to experiment.
CHESS PLAYERS check their mates.
CHIROPRACTORS do it by manipulation.
CLOCK MAKERS do it mechanically.
CLOWNS do it for laughs.
COACHES whistle while they work.
COBOL PROGRAMMERS do it with bugs.
COCKTAIL WAITRESSES serve highballs.
COMPUTER GAME PLAYERS just can't stop.
COMPUTER OPERATORS get the most out of their software.
CONSTRUCTION WORKERS lay a better foundation.
CONSULTANTS tell other how to do it.
COPS have bigger guns.
COWBOYS handle anything horny.
COWGIRLS like to ride bareback.
CRANE OPERATORS have swinging balls.
CREDIT MANAGERS always collect.
DANCERS do it in leaps and bounds.
DEADHEADS do it with Jerry.
DEER HUNTERS will do anything for a buck.
DENTAL HYGIENISTS do it till it hurts.
DENTISTS do it in your mouth.
DETECTIVES do it under cover.
DIETICIANS eat better.
DIRECT MAILERS get it in the sack.
DIVERS do it deeper.
DOCTORS do it with patience.
DRUGGISTS fill your prescription.
DRUMMERS do it in 4/4 time.
DRY WALLER'S are better bangers.
ELECTRICIANS check your shorts.
ENGINEERS charge by the hour.
EXECUTIVES have large staffs.
FARMERS spread it around.
FIREMEN are always in heat.
FISHERMEN are proud of their rods.
FOOTBALL PLAYERS are measured by the yard.
FOUR-WHEELERS eat more bush.
FURRIERS appreciate good beaver.
GARBAGE MEN come once a week.
GARDENERS have 50 foot hoses.
GAS STATION ATTENDANTS pump all day.
GEOLOGISTS are great explorers.
GOLFERS do it in 18 holes.
GYMNASTS mount and dismount well.
HACKERS do it with fewer instructions.
HAIRDRESSERS give the best blow jobs.
HAM OPERATORS do it with frequency.
HANDYMEN like good screws.
HEWLETT PACKARD does it with precision.
HORSEBACK RIDERS stay in the saddle longer.
HUNTERS do it with a bang.
INSURANCE SALESMEN are premium lovers.
INTERIOR DECORATORS do it all over the house.
INVENTORS find a way.
JANITORS clean up afterwards.
JEWELERS mount real gems.
JOGGERS do it on the run.
LANDSCAPERS plant it deeper.
LAWYERS do it in their briefs.
LIBRARIANS do it quietly.
LOCKSMITHS can get into anything.
LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS last longer.
MACHINISTS make the best screws.
MAGICIANS are quicker than the eye.
MAINTENANCE MEN sweep 'em off their feet.
MANAGERS supervise others.
MARKETING REPs do it on commission.
MILKMEN deliver twice a week.
MILLIONAIRES pay to have it done.
MINERS sink deeper shafts.
MINISTERS do it on Sundays.
MISSILE MEN have better thrust.
MODELS do it in any position.
MODEM MANUFACTURERS do it with all sorts of characters.
MOTORCYCLISTS like something hot between their legs.
MOVIE STARS do it on film.
MUSICIANS do it with rhythm.
NONSMOKERS do it without huffing and puffing.
NURSES call the shots.
OCEANOGRAPHERS do it down under.
OPERATORS do it person-to-person.
OPTOMETRISTS do it face-to-face.
PAINTERS do it with longer strokes.
PARAMEDICS PHOTOGRAPHERS do it with a flash.
PHYSICISTS do it with uniform harmonic motion.
PILOTS keep it up longer.
PLUMBERS do it under the sink.
POLICEMEN like big busts.
POLITICIANS do it for 4 years then have to get re-erected.
POSTMEN come slower.
PRINTERS do it without wrinkling the sheets.
PRINTERS reproduce the fastest.
PROCTOLOGISTS do it in the end.
PROFESSORS do it by the book.
RACERS like to come in first.
RACQUETBALL PLAYERS do it off the wall..
RADIO and TV ANNOUNCERS broadcast it.
REAL ESTATE PEOPLE know all the prime spots.
RECYCLERS use it again.
REPAIRMEN can fix anything.
REPORTERS do it daily.
RESEARCHERS are still looking for it.
RETAILERS move their merchandise.
ROOFERS do it on top.
RUNNERS get into more pants.
SAILORS like to be blown.
SALESPEOPLE have away with their tongues.
SCIENTISTS discovered it.
SECRETARIES do it from 9 to 5.
SKYDIVERS are good till the last drop.
SOCCER PLAYERS have leather balls.
SPEECH PATHOLOGISTS are oral specialists.
SPELUNKERS do it underground.
SPORTSCASTERS like an instant replay.
STEWARDESSES do it in the air.
STUDENTS use their heads.
SURGEONS are smooth operators.
TAILORS make it fit.
TAXI DRIVERS do it all over town.
TAXIDERMISTS mount anything.
TELEPHONE CO. EMPLOYEES let their fingers do the walking.
TELLERS can handle all deposits and withdrawals.
TENNIS PLAYERS have fuzzy balls.
TRUCK DRIVERS have bigger dipsticks.
TRUCKERS carry bigger loads.
TYPISTS do it in triplicate.
VETERINARIANS are pussy lovers.
VOLLEYBALL PLAYERS keep it up.
WAITRESSES serve it piping hot.
WATER SKIERS come down harder.
WELDERS have hotter rods.
WRESTLERS know the best holds.
WRITERS have novel ways.
ZOOLOGISTS do it with animal instinct.
person1: whats your job
person2: im an ambulance driver
person1: you come quicker then
person2: ay??!!
person1: its on this job list called HOW PEOPLE HAVE SEX
person2: cool
person2: im an ambulance driver
person1: you come quicker then
person2: ay??!!
person1: its on this job list called HOW PEOPLE HAVE SEX
person2: cool
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) June 22, 2009
this is for women
you get your man to lay on the bed with a hard on, u then run at door, u grab on to it and fling yourself off it, and you try and land on your partners cock, very pleasurable if you can get it right, the swinging off the door is where the monkey comes from
you get your man to lay on the bed with a hard on, u then run at door, u grab on to it and fling yourself off it, and you try and land on your partners cock, very pleasurable if you can get it right, the swinging off the door is where the monkey comes from
person1: i gave my partner a monkey fuck last night
person2: wtf
person1: you don't know what it means
person1: (explains it to her)
person2: cool, i might try it
person2: wtf
person1: you don't know what it means
person1: (explains it to her)
person2: cool, i might try it
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) July 6, 2009
a great sport all in all, requires an unbeliveable amount of precision and skill, takes so much practice as most people will appreciate, milimeters off perfect strike and it's a shit shot, that is why golf is payed huge amounts in professional tournaments.
the fitness side of things is amazing most golfers are extremely athletic, aswell as walking a course which is about 4-5 miles long. it is a game 4 the fit!
the fitness side of things is amazing most golfers are extremely athletic, aswell as walking a course which is about 4-5 miles long. it is a game 4 the fit!
golf seems the easyist thing 2 play in the world when u r playin well, and can also seems the hardest game in the worl when u r playin shit
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) September 19, 2009
a sex position where u are fucking one woman while fingering the two women either side of the one in the middle, the arms pointing out is where the waiter comes from
person1: hey i just made up a new sex position called the waiter
person2: wot is is
person1: (whispers it to him)
person2: sweet i have 3 girls comin over my house i'll try it!
person2: wot is is
person1: (whispers it to him)
person2: sweet i have 3 girls comin over my house i'll try it!
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) July 31, 2009
did u hear that four fingered kit kat
by DJ SPYKERZ(SCOUSED OUT) June 4, 2009