Cunningest Linguist's definitions

Tiger Woods

To get divorced by way of playing 18 holes on the skanky public course when you've got a perfectly good place to use your putter in your own house.

Suddenly, doing the Tiger Woods tour took on a whole new meaning.

by Cunningest Linguist January 1, 2010

posting

A traditional execution method where a person is lifted onto a sharp stake in the ground and impaled rectally. The body weight slowly causes the person to be further impaled until a vital organ is reached, causing death.

I hereby sentence you, Rosie O'Donnell, to death by posting.

by Cunningest Linguist October 2, 2006

insurance

A business that involves selling people promises to pay later that are never fulfilled.

Gomer paid flood insurance premium for years, but then the insurer decided to go out of business when the flood came because management had spent all the premium on hookers and private jets.

by Cunningest Linguist August 14, 2008

paradox

A pair (i.e. 2) of ducks.

I went to the farm and slaughtered a paradox.

by Cunningest Linguist October 2, 2006

Testaverticles

Alternate spelling for Testaverde.

I had Testaverticles on my fantasy football team and he killed my season.

by Cunningest Linguist May 26, 2006