33 definitions by Crunchyness

Another Man's Fecal Matter

Like when someone uses a pulic bathroom and there are poop streaks and they are afraid of getting blamed for A.M.F.M.
I went in to the office bathroom and the guy before had left duty-streaks in the bowl. All I did was urinate, but as I left a cutie was heading to use the restroom and I knew she was going to blame me for A.M.F.M.
by Crunchyness May 12, 2007
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When a girl is naked and asleep under the covers and you get a flashlight (or a cell phone will do) and check out the goods. Usually done when you first sleep with someone, but can be done with girlfriends, friends, whatever.
A girl can perform this on a sleeping dude as well.
Laying there next to his hot one night stand, the perv grabs his cell phone and goes spelunking to get a closer look at her love clam.
by Crunchyness June 1, 2009
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a fortune cookie that doesn't actually have a fortune in it, instead they package it with a lame statement like; Versatility is one of your greatest features.
Guy 1: Heh, what does you fortune cookie say?
Guy 2: Its not a fortune cookie its a goddamn statement cookie, it reads, " To understand a man, you must listen to his words."
Guy 1: Duh that's not only a statement, but its fucking obvious, more like a douche cookie.
by Crunchyness September 19, 2007
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the rampage of a woman with cramps
Guy 1: Did you see that? Your girl just hockey checked that chick, and then smashed through a wall. Dude, she was screaming like a bull and her veins were almost popping off all over.

Guy 2: Yeah, she's got pms, and she's on one of her crampages again
by Crunchyness February 1, 2008
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Being able to comfortably wipe one's booty with both hands.
After breaking my right hand, which I normally wipe with, I had to become ambiwipestrous in order to comfortably cleanse my booty particles.
by Crunchyness November 2, 2009
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one who builds cocks. Positive if you are a girl, negative if you are a guy. Building cock is making it grow.
Used positively: Did you see that little blond with the glasses that just walked in? She'ssuch a cock builder!

Used negatively: I hate when all you do is sit there like a fucking cock builder.
by Crunchyness May 5, 2007
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rape of oneself
rape + masturbation
I totally got drunk last night and had a sad session of rapesturbation...I was crying the whole time
by Crunchyness March 14, 2008
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