Definitions by Chernorizets Hrabr
tool
There are several defining traits of a tool; if one or more of these characteristics apply to you, then you are a tool.
1. You often feel used by your "friends", who usually make fun of you to both to your face and behind your back, but act polite if you have something they want. Of course, because you're desperate to be accepted, you give it to them.
2. You buy into whatever trend seems in at the moment because you have no identity or sense of pride. If you're emo, pass out at parties after 4 drinks to show off to people that you're drunk, or wear a pink shirt with the collar popped in a vain attempt to appear "secure with your masculinity", then you're a tool and haven't realized it yet.
3. You listen to Tool and think they are the pinnacle of musical talent because they call themselves "prog", but are actually boring and mediocre.
1. You often feel used by your "friends", who usually make fun of you to both to your face and behind your back, but act polite if you have something they want. Of course, because you're desperate to be accepted, you give it to them.
2. You buy into whatever trend seems in at the moment because you have no identity or sense of pride. If you're emo, pass out at parties after 4 drinks to show off to people that you're drunk, or wear a pink shirt with the collar popped in a vain attempt to appear "secure with your masculinity", then you're a tool and haven't realized it yet.
3. You listen to Tool and think they are the pinnacle of musical talent because they call themselves "prog", but are actually boring and mediocre.
tool by Chernorizets Hrabr December 28, 2005
KoRn
Innovators of the heavy metal subgenre we now know as nu-metal or aggro-rock. Korn currently consist of 4 members now that rhythm guitarist Head has departed the band; Jonathan Davis, a great frontman and talented vocalist, Munky, a rather average guitarist (along with Head), Fieldy, a pretty slick bassist who greatly defines the band's sound, and Dave Silveria, an underrated and highly talented drummer. KoRn is known for their heavy sound, low-tuned guitars and dark themes and humour.
KoRn has many devoted fans around the world who love them for the music, not because of some poseur teen-angst image complex. It is because of these poseurs that many people hate KoRn, basing their opinion on the fact that many people who like the band shop at Hot Topic and suck at life, so the band must suck too. In reality, KoRn are respected by musicians as innovators, and famous because their sound simply kicks ass. KoRn acknowledges the fact that their recent albums have been sub-par due to wiggerism and promises to return to their roots in their next album. Hey, at least they admit it and learn from it, unlike some bands who use the phrase "people don't like it just because it's different" as an excuse for their crapiness.
In conclusion, you don't have to like KoRn... just don't hate on them for stupid reasons. A lot of people think "real" metal bands like Iron Maiden and Lamb of God suck too, so keep that in mind when you bash them.
KoRn has many devoted fans around the world who love them for the music, not because of some poseur teen-angst image complex. It is because of these poseurs that many people hate KoRn, basing their opinion on the fact that many people who like the band shop at Hot Topic and suck at life, so the band must suck too. In reality, KoRn are respected by musicians as innovators, and famous because their sound simply kicks ass. KoRn acknowledges the fact that their recent albums have been sub-par due to wiggerism and promises to return to their roots in their next album. Hey, at least they admit it and learn from it, unlike some bands who use the phrase "people don't like it just because it's different" as an excuse for their crapiness.
In conclusion, you don't have to like KoRn... just don't hate on them for stupid reasons. A lot of people think "real" metal bands like Iron Maiden and Lamb of God suck too, so keep that in mind when you bash them.
KoRn by Chernorizets Hrabr August 28, 2005
metalcore
The latest trend in metal music... if you want to call it that. Metalcore is a genre crossbreed of heavy metal and hardcore that claims to be better than its nu-metal predecessors, which in some ways is true. However, metalcore is bad in it's own right. For example, every metalcore band sounds exactly the same, and god forbid the lead singers actually try to "sing" for once instead of the usual incoherent bad screaming. Metalcore is also unappealing and unlistenable to all but a small audience of devoted fans, as the songs lack any real hooks which keeps it from getting too mainstream, a double-edged sword. Metalcore has its ups, however; most metalcore bands are at least twice as talented as their nu-metal counterparts (instrumentally) and lacks the annoying rap aspect of said music. Heavy Metal fans should own at least one decent metalcore CD from bands like "Down the Sun" or "Sinai Beach", if only for the sake of being obnoxious and blasting it in your car with the windows down.
Metalcore... whatever...
metalcore by Chernorizets Hrabr June 7, 2005
Yuengling
Along with Sam Adams, Amstel and Miller Genuine Draft, Yuengling is proof that America is capable of making a great beer. Beats the shit out of Heineken.
Yuengling by Chernorizets Hrabr March 31, 2005
Whinge Rock
Whinge Rock consists of all the bands your dad probably likes. Prime examples of whinge rock are mediocre bands such as Nickelback, Puddle of Mudd, 3 Doors Down, and Three Days Grace. Whinge rock is characterized by power chords, a singer who tries to sound tough, and being repetitive. Linkin Park, albeit whiny, is not whinge rock because the fanbase is too young, and it has more nu-metal traits than those of rock.
Nickelback, Puddle of Mudd, and 3 Doors Down just toured together. It was the ultimate tour of mediocrity and whinge rock.
Whinge Rock by Chernorizets Hrabr March 31, 2005
Green Day
A sort-of punk rock band that was good but not extremely popular until recently, when thousands of teenyboppers found out about them on TRL, believing their newest and worst CD to date to be "teh bset". Now every fourteen year old in the country rants about how great Boulevard of Broken Dreams is and are known to exclaim things such as "OMG BILLY JOE IS HAWT!!!1" and "DONT WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT!!12". Their new CD is mediocre at best, so please listen to their other albums instead.
The typical Green Day "fan" has never heard of Nimrod or Kerplunk, but totally eats up the new pop-punk garbage.
Green Day by Chernorizets Hrabr March 16, 2005
Clay Aiken
The guy who didn't win American Idol simply because Ruben is black. Face it, it's the truth. Now, I'm not a fan of either of them OR the show itself, but listen to Ruben's songs and then Clay's songs and honestly try to tell me with a straight face that Ruben deserved to win. Incidentally, the black community recently accused American Idol of being "racist" and "discriminatory" despite the fact that 2 out of three winners were black. Bullshit. "Sorry for 2004"? How bout "Sorry for rigging the contest"?
Clay Aiken by Chernorizets Hrabr February 11, 2005