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Chernorizets Hrabr's definitions

Blacktooth

Slang for bluetooth device, derived from its popularity amongst the black community as the newest form of tacky, high-tech "bling". Insecure negroes who want to put on an air of importance wear them when not necessary (i.e. any time not spent driving), even when nobody calls them all day. When they do, however, they will talk loudly in public whilst flailing their limbs about to demonstrate the wonder of wireless technology and the money they spent avoiding child support payments.
"Leeroy should take off that blacktooth device; he looks like a tool and nobody is impressed."
by Chernorizets Hrabr June 23, 2008
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Ganondorf

Semi-famous villain from the Nintendo 64 adventure, The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time. Ganondorf has an exceptionally unique case of unibrow, in which his eyebrows connect clearly with his hair, thus forming one very long eyebrow. This puts the typical unibrow (one that connects in the middle of one's face above the nose) to shame.
Ganondorf was one of the most easily-defeated bosses in the history of video games.
by Chernorizets Hrabr October 5, 2004
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Jersey Redneck

There are more Jersey Rednecks than you once believed!

Jersey rednecks typically dwell in backwood areas within Philadelphian surburbs, where there is still plenty of rural land for the blue collar folk. Almost every Jersey redneck owns a chevy pickup truck, which they park in their "driveway", which is not really a driveway but an area of their lawn in which grass isn't growing. Their front yards are home to various appliances and vehicles that no longer function, somehow finding their way there. Jersey rednecks love Marlboro cigarettes (because Newports are for "negroes" and Camels are for "A-rabs"), Skoal, Budweiser, Natural Ice and especially Keystone. The origins of their slow southern accent is mysterious, though speculation reveals that it is probably from listening to too much Lynyrd Skynyrd. Instead of "you guys" they will say "youz guys", and "tuh'marry" instead of "tomorrow". The Jersey redneck's idea of a dream vacation is a week-long trip to Wildwood.
No one thought hicks lived so far north until the Jersey redneck was discovered.
by Chernorizets Hrabr November 6, 2004
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Aragorn

Aragorn, son of Arathorn (quite possibly the coolest name ever) is the rightful heir to the throne of Gondor in J.R.R. Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings" series. He is one of the Dunedain, a subrace of humans blessed with long life. Aragorn is 87 years old when he takes the throne, but he looks like he's about 33. That's how cool he is. In fact, all the chicks love Aragorn more than Legolas. This is scientific proof that Viggo Mortensen, who played Aragorn in The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, is cooler than Orlando Bloom. Aragorn also smokes weed, though just about every character in the story does except pussy Frodo. It is widely believed that Aragorn is the coolest guy in Middle Earth, especially because he got with Liv Tyler.
Every man in the world who knows who Aragorn is wishes to be him.
by Chernorizets Hrabr August 20, 2004
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Ralph Nader

The guy that my fellow Americans should have voted for, but apparently they don't have enough common sense to see what kind of damage is being done to our country by the divisive two-party system. An honest and real candidate who cares about domestic concerns that Bush and Kerry seem to have forgotten about in favor of fear-mongering, focusing on the so-called "threat" of terrorism.
Ralph has my vote, no matter the odds!
by Chernorizets Hrabr November 2, 2004
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ORLANDO BLOOM

Someone that none of you fat, ugly, ditzy schoolgirls will ever have a chance with. If I were him I'd carry that bow around to fend you losers off. Leave the poor guy alone.
Orlando Bloom can do 200x better than you and he will.
by Chernorizets Hrabr July 6, 2004
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Post-grunge

Music that killed grunge worse than a bullet to Kurt Cobain's head or Layne Staley's speedball overdose ever could. Post-grunge is a more mainstream version of grunge music, which seems a rather inoffensive thing at first, but contemporary acts such as Puddle of Mudd, Nickelback, Three Doors Down, Godsmack, Staind, Creed and Three Days Grace reveals the genre to be a parody of original grunge. Exaggerated attempts at singing like Eddie Vedder, predictable and formulatic song structures, and insincere angst with no artistic quality are characteristics of post-grunge.
(Listening to typical rock radio station)

Thomas: Hey, this kinda sounds like Alice in Chains, only the guitar sucks, the lyrics are trite, and the singer's vocal range is garbage.

Fred: Yeah, that's Godsmack, another post-grunge act.
by Chernorizets Hrabr January 5, 2008
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