Definitions by Chernorizets Hrabr
Metallica Jr.
Also known as Godsmack, a post-grunge alternative metal band known for ripping off Metallica. Vocalist Sully Erna sings as if doing a bad James Hetfield impression and steals song names and ideas from Metallica albums. Godsmack's newest album contains two songs with identical titles as Metallica tracks, "Bleeding Me" (from Load) and "Temptation" (a St. Anger b-side). Blatantly ripped off from Metallica is Godsmack's "The Enemy", with an uncanny resemblance to "Sad But True" (The Black Album). Ironically, the lyrics in this song relate to a cheap, sub-standard mockery of an original. Sully sings "I know, everbody knows you're tryin' to be like me... but even at your best as a man you couldn't equal half of me." Maybe James should have written that song about Sully.
Any Metallica fan listening to Godsmack will burst out in laughter when they see the obvious mimicry.
Any Metallica fan listening to Godsmack will burst out in laughter when they see the obvious mimicry.
Metallica let Godsmack open for them on the "Madly in Anger With You Tour" '04 to make themselves look like gods in comparison. Godsmack was just Metallica Jr.
Metallica Jr. by Chernorizets Hrabr October 20, 2006
stoner
The word "stoner" is commonly used to describe someone who smokes marijuana or hash on a regular basis. Stoners consider themselves to be friendly, fun-loving, non-judgemental, and harmless. Rarely mentioned, however, is how lazy, worthless, annoying, flakey, boring and unproductive a good 95% of them are. A common phrase used among stoners is "I don't need weed to have fun", yet strangely you never see them go a day without it.
Stoners, in their "enlightened" state, are the first to speak out against controversial issues and injustices but the very last to ever lift a finger over it. Most (but not all) tend to resemble the character Shaggy from the cartoon show Scooby Doo in either looks or general behaviour. A stoner will tell you how great a sense of humor he has, but usually laughs at things that are not truly that funny in a sober state of mind.
When confronted about their overall worthlessness, stoners vehemently deny that smoking weed makes them losers or hinders success in life. While some successful people DO indeed smoke marijuana, they are usually not actually stoners, meaning they partake only occassionaly and not as a lifestyle. The few stoners who ARE successful and live fulfilling lives are a rare breed, and not truly representative of what it is to be a stoner. Unbeknownst to them, there is a difference between a pot smoker and a full-out stoner.
If you are a stoner, you should be ashamed of yourself and extinguish your joint on your own exposed flesh immediately. Aim higher, get a girlfriend, find a new hobby, and get a decent job. Then when you discover better things in life, you'll finally figure out why everyone looked down on you.
Stoners, in their "enlightened" state, are the first to speak out against controversial issues and injustices but the very last to ever lift a finger over it. Most (but not all) tend to resemble the character Shaggy from the cartoon show Scooby Doo in either looks or general behaviour. A stoner will tell you how great a sense of humor he has, but usually laughs at things that are not truly that funny in a sober state of mind.
When confronted about their overall worthlessness, stoners vehemently deny that smoking weed makes them losers or hinders success in life. While some successful people DO indeed smoke marijuana, they are usually not actually stoners, meaning they partake only occassionaly and not as a lifestyle. The few stoners who ARE successful and live fulfilling lives are a rare breed, and not truly representative of what it is to be a stoner. Unbeknownst to them, there is a difference between a pot smoker and a full-out stoner.
If you are a stoner, you should be ashamed of yourself and extinguish your joint on your own exposed flesh immediately. Aim higher, get a girlfriend, find a new hobby, and get a decent job. Then when you discover better things in life, you'll finally figure out why everyone looked down on you.
Stoners believe that smoking weed likens them to famous figures such as Jimi Hendrix, 50 Cent, Ali G, Johnny Knoxville, Bill Clinton, Cheech & Chong and Bob Marley. Guess what? It doesn't.
stoner by Chernorizets Hrabr October 19, 2006
mainstreamer
One who follows current trends. This term is most often applied to one who listens to popular music (played on the radio and MTV), usually with negative connotations.
Many people who refer to themselves as members of the so-called underground believe that mainstreamers are tasteless and brainwashed by popular mass media; if something is well known or popular, it is automatically "lobotomized corporate claptrap". Though this can be true, there are many exceptions. Mainstream music fans, on the other hand, believe that little to no media exposure for a band means that the band sucks. Other people, who like what they like whether it's popular or not, consider both groups to be douchebags for denying themselves potential enjoyment for a goofy image complex that they won't give a crap about when they have to get a job and move out of mom's basement.
Many people who refer to themselves as members of the so-called underground believe that mainstreamers are tasteless and brainwashed by popular mass media; if something is well known or popular, it is automatically "lobotomized corporate claptrap". Though this can be true, there are many exceptions. Mainstream music fans, on the other hand, believe that little to no media exposure for a band means that the band sucks. Other people, who like what they like whether it's popular or not, consider both groups to be douchebags for denying themselves potential enjoyment for a goofy image complex that they won't give a crap about when they have to get a job and move out of mom's basement.
1. Haha, that mainstreamer bimbo just said that Britney Spears is one of the world's most talented artists! What a retard.
2. Hey man, I just burned a great Metallica CD... but Metallica is a household name, and you only listen to "underground metal", so you won't like it despite the fact that they'll always blow your little Cannibal Corpse, Opeth, Zao, Killswitch Engage and Lamb of God away. Too bad for you.
2. Hey man, I just burned a great Metallica CD... but Metallica is a household name, and you only listen to "underground metal", so you won't like it despite the fact that they'll always blow your little Cannibal Corpse, Opeth, Zao, Killswitch Engage and Lamb of God away. Too bad for you.
mainstreamer by Chernorizets Hrabr September 9, 2006
Tool fan
Avid listeners of the alternative metal band known as Tool. Tool fans believe that, by listening to music with no concept of time signatures and pseudo-cryptic lyrics sang by a man known as Maynard Ivory James Keenan Wayans, it puts them on a higher intellectual and musical plateau than fans of non-"prog" bands. You can pick a Tool fan out of a crowd easily, by looking for a college student who speaks of issues which he has little to no understanding of, rants about conspiracy theories, is a half-hearted activist and constantly reeks of bong water. A Tool fan, as a rule, will never look presentable, wearing yesterday's hoodie and a baseball cap over his unwashed and shaggy hair.
You know Jeff? That annoying kid who shows up 30 minutes late to class every day with serious redeye and voices his stance on everything from abortion to extraterrestrialism without being asked? I hear he's a big Tool fan. Figures.
Tool fan by Chernorizets Hrabr August 28, 2006
Fall Out Boy
A (now) mainstream four-piece band categorized as pop punk, pop rock, emo, or combinations of the three. Known for their nasal vocalist, simplistic guitar riffs, basslines consisting of no more than four notes which cannot even be successfully played at a live show, and "poetic" lyrics such as "WE'RE GOIN" DOWN, DOWN, ENALURBLYURAAHLL...", it's no surprise that Fall Out Boy is one of the most popular rock acts today, particularly among 14-21 year old females and males confused about their orientation.
Fall Out Boy differs from similar bands in that their bassist acts as (or tries to act as) the frontman of the group, without singing or adequately playing his instrument. Though he ranks as the least talented member of the band, Pete Wentz garners most of the group's media attention, being the only 6 while surrounded by 3's and 4's. Pete also writes the "brilliant lyrics" indecipherably crooned by singer Patrick Stump. In an attempt to appear quirky and clever, titles of Fall Out Boy songs are usually a sentence long. The exposure of Wentz' genitalia is irrelevent and was likely brought to the media forefront by the band itself as a failed publicity stunt.
Taking note of the band's lack of... everything, it is a mystery how Fall Out Boy is successfully marketed. There are no timeless hooks, no particularly attractive band members to get the teenyboppers riled up, nothing instrumentally impressive or innovative, and nothing that hasn't been done before several times (and with less ego) by Blink 182 or even Simple Plan. The success of Fall Out Boy remains an enigma, as well as a trademark of the tastelessness of teenage youth and anyone who refers to themself as emo.
Fall Out Boy differs from similar bands in that their bassist acts as (or tries to act as) the frontman of the group, without singing or adequately playing his instrument. Though he ranks as the least talented member of the band, Pete Wentz garners most of the group's media attention, being the only 6 while surrounded by 3's and 4's. Pete also writes the "brilliant lyrics" indecipherably crooned by singer Patrick Stump. In an attempt to appear quirky and clever, titles of Fall Out Boy songs are usually a sentence long. The exposure of Wentz' genitalia is irrelevent and was likely brought to the media forefront by the band itself as a failed publicity stunt.
Taking note of the band's lack of... everything, it is a mystery how Fall Out Boy is successfully marketed. There are no timeless hooks, no particularly attractive band members to get the teenyboppers riled up, nothing instrumentally impressive or innovative, and nothing that hasn't been done before several times (and with less ego) by Blink 182 or even Simple Plan. The success of Fall Out Boy remains an enigma, as well as a trademark of the tastelessness of teenage youth and anyone who refers to themself as emo.
Fall Out Boy by Chernorizets Hrabr August 11, 2006
Eurotrash
Typically of Eastern European descent, eurotrash are pale, lanky nocturnal young adults temporarily living in the United States to take advantage of inflation and return to their home countries. Eurotrash usually work as chambermaids, waitresses, or McDonald's drive-thru cashiers. Though they are supposedly working to pay for tuition, Eurotrash almost always blow their not-so-hard-earned money on FCUK shirts, hairgel, highlights, unnecessary jewelery, green shoes, and anything that says "Dior" on it. When not lamenting their grueling 4 hour shifts and screwing up orders, they interact solely with people from their own country. Some well known hobbies of Eurotrash include smoking cheap cigarettes, drinking copious amounts of vodka, refraining from the consumption of food, making rude and/or lewd comments in obscure languages, and complaining about how there is no "Discotek" nearby.
While on their cigarette break, Todor and Stevcho saw a guy wearing a hoodie and jeans that were not bought from The GAP, and went on about how Americans "have no sense of style". What eurotrash.
Eurotrash by Chernorizets Hrabr July 13, 2006
AAA
AAA by Chernorizets Hrabr April 17, 2006