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Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

float

A large vehicle, usually propelled by an engine, used as a moving stage or mobile display in a parade.

In the Rose Parade, floats are ridden by men and women in costumes to celebrate New Years Day.

In every Poofters on Parade parade, a float is ridden (certainly not "manned") by poofters, fags, butt eaters, and corn holers wearing jock straps. They mince, prance, and blow kisses to the crowd. This is all very impressive to white liberals, who always show up to wave at the sissies.
The Dykes on Bikes lead the annual Poofters on Parade parade. Behind the Dykes roll 64 floats covered with mincing pouves, fluttering faerie queans, and swaggering butches.
by Cap'n Bullmoose November 11, 2006
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ash tray breath

The typical breath stench of the redneck, fool, and skank. Caused by smoking a cigarette.
Karen has ash tray breath. It smells like the dung of a thousand camels.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005
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spade cat

An African American man.

This word was common among jazz musicians in the 1940s and 1950s, but fell out of favor in recent times because of politically correct bull. This was never a racial slur, although politically correct twits think it is today.
The spade cat lay down a great riff during his sax solo.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2005
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paradox

A sound logical argument leading to a logical absurdity.
Here is a paradox:

Nothing is better than a glass of beer.
A half-glass of beer is better than nothing.
Therefore, a half-glass of beer is better than a glass of beer.
by Cap'n Bullmoose November 11, 2006
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Texas t-shirt

An ass gasket. A paper toilet seat cover commonly found in public restrooms.

This expression has been common since at least the 1950s, and cold be older.
Mrs. Murphy put a Texas t-shirt onto the toilet seat in Hannigan's Bar.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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Public Transportation

A means of urban transportation used mainly by the underprivileged and the working poor
Public Transportation in many cities is a rolling crime wave. Muggers, Crips, Bloods, Pachucos, Hip Hop assholes, Gangstas, A-Rabs, and other criminals ride public transportation with their ghetto blasters blaring. They challenge honest working stiffs, force them to stand, steal their money, and make them listen to evil Hip Hop "music."
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007
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homeless

A bum.
A wino.
A liberal word, used by effeminate liberals instead of the word "bum."
All good effeminate liberals call bums homeless. By doing this, they can can whine, "Oh, let's all help the homeless," just like the people of San Francisco. They said let's build homes and put all the homeless people inside them. Then nobody will be homeless. Ooh, aren't we good liberals? Barack O'Bama will love us!
So the liberals built homes. Then they went out on the streets and collected all the bums and put them in the homes. See, no more homeless!
Now, the San Francisco coppers have discovered that all those people on the streets who piss on the sidewalk and shit in the gutter and throw muscatel bottles on your front porch have addresses. They aren't homeless.
See, aren't those San Francisco liberals nice? They've spent over 100 million taxpayer dollars, but there are no more homeless people in San Francisco!
Just bums.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 16, 2008
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