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Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

Brooklyn Assault Rifle

A Winchester model 1894 .30-30 rifle. This definition was created by the late Colonel Jeff Cooper.
Pansy ass liberals wring their hands and whine about "assault rifles," which, they say, are the favorite weapon of the Crips, the Bloods, and the Pachucos. A pansy ass liberal calls any black, ugly, semiautomatic rifle an assault rifle, which is like calling any black, ugly cat a dog. To keep from getting their pansy asses kicked, many liberals say they don't want to outlaw hunting or legitimate hunting rifles. Virtually all of those liberals will agree that a Winchester 1894 .30-30 is a hunting rifle. So there you have it: A wonderful, fast-shooting, accurate rifle just right for blasting Crips, Bloods, and Pachucos in defense of your home, your family, and yourself. This is the Brooklyn Assault Rifle. Get one today and start cleaning up your neighborhood while fooling your local pansy ass liberals.

Semiautomatic rifles will shoot faster than a Brooklyn Assault Rifle. But your .30-30 is far more accurate. With practice, you can shoot a Winchester 94 with great speed and accuracy.

You'll be able to keep your Brooklyn Assault Rifle after president O'Bama, the Irish Jig, confiscates all your handguns to keep you from hurting yourself when Pachucos invade your home.
by Cap'n Bullmoose July 3, 2008
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salt water Mexican

A person from the Phillipine Islands. A Flip.
Florencio is one cool salt water Mexican. He doesn't giggle like a monkey.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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bozo

An incompetent computer programmer.

An incompetent boss in a tech shop.
Trent is such a bozo!
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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Duck Ass

A hairstyle from the mid 1950s that resembled a duck's arse. Both men and women wore this hairstyle. On men, it was held in place with grease.

Also called a D.A.
by Cap'n Bullmoose May 14, 2005
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ass hole

An orifice that ladies and gentlemen use to take dumps and blow binderfenders.

An orifice that a poofter uses like a lollipop.
Miss Livingston looked both ways, then blew a binderfender out of her ass hole, which frightened all the birds from the trees. Miss Livingston said "Oh, dear."

Trent the corn-holing poofter licked Creighton's ass hole like it was a chocolate ice cream cone. Then he licked his chops and said, "Oh, how tasty."
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 4, 2008
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automatic

A type of automobile transmission used by old granny ladies, girlie girls, girlie men, and sissy boys.

You can spot cars with automatic transmissions as you drive on any road. The drivers step on the brakes for random cosmic events. If they see a fuzz, they step on the brakes. If they see a car pull up to a side street, they step on the brakes. If they come to an intersection, they step on the brakes. If they see a crow, they step on the brakes.

The repeated brake lights warn all stick shift drivers that a totally incompetent "driver" is operating the car.
No man with any self respect would ever drive a car with an automatic transmission.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2005
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Portagee pegnoir

An ass gasket. A Texas t-shirt. A paper toilet seat cover found in many public commodes.

From the gauzy, diaphenous appearance.

The expression has been around at least from the 1950s.
Charlie wore a Portagee pegnoir around his neck at the party.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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