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Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

45

A phonograph record played at 45 RPM. It was about 8 inches across and had a very large central hole. It played a single song.
Peggy Sue has a whole box of Elvis 45s.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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fudge packer

A corn holer. A "man" who packs "fudge" up another man's arse.
Bruce is a fudge packer. He enjoys corn holing the dog, as well as Tammany. He just loves to burgle turds, and adores having his arse licked.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 27, 2007
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jock strap

A banana hammock. A jewelbox (for the family jewels).
Bernie wore only a jockstrap on the float in the Poofters on Parade parade.
by Cap'n Bullmoose May 14, 2005
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poofter

The proper, polite word for a male homosexual.

A person who plays Circle Jerk on your front porch, then rings the doorbell and runs away.

A person who enjoys eating butt and burgling turds.
Leonard the White Liberal felt that he must celebrate diversity, so he went to watch the "Poofters on Parade" parade in San Fagcisco. The Dykes on Bikes reminded him of the lions and tigers in a circus parade. Kind of scary! But he enjoyed watching the pooters prancing on their floats. He blew kisses to them as they swished by wearing jock straps. When we saw a chubby poofter wearing cute little bunny ears making prissy lips at the crowd, Leonard decided that, next year, he would be in the parade too.
by Cap'n Bullmoose November 19, 2006
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Wetlands

The liberal word for a swamp, a marsh, or a mudflat.
You must never say "swamp" when a white liberal is in the room. She will be offended! You must always say "wetlands" so she won't be offended.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 18, 2008
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tile peeler

A vile and mephitic fart. A fart that stinks so badly, it will clear out a smoke-filled pool hall. Downright nasty fart.
Melissa fired off a tile peeler in church, proving the Confucian adage, "Lady who fart in church sit in own pew."
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005
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cotquean

A man who busies himself with activities more suitable for a woman.

A big sissy.
Clarence was tatting doilies again today. He's a real cotquean.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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