Bob Johnson's definitions

China

One of the oldest countries in the world, it has a rich cultural history extending back roughly 5 or 6 millenia. The Xia dynasty were the first real royal line, overthrown by the Shang dynasty, who were, in turn, ousted in a revolution by the Zhou (pronounced 'show'). Gradually, China expanded, and with the discovery of tea, a rich cultre developed. It fostered the development of the Daoist religion as well as Confucianism, named after its founder. Once invaded by Mongolia, China found true prosperity under the wise rule of Kublai Khan. By the 1800s, China was probably the most advanced nation on the planet, with public libraries, schools and plentiful resources. However, after the population boom and following colonial conquests, China lost its Emperor in 1919. A nationalist leadership was set up, lasting through WW2 until, in 1949, Mao Tse-Tung overthrew it, creating the communist dictatorship we all know today.

China is responsible for such wonders as the Terracotta Army and the birth of Confucianism.

by Bob Johnson May 20, 2004

PATRIOT ACT

Passed by 98 votes to 1 in congress, the only member against the movement being Russ Fenigold of Wisconsin. The legislation is a maze, legible by only the best lawyers. Basically, it blurs the lines on treatment of detainees. It has led to many incidents of Bush strangling America's liberties: over 950 counts of false charges have been recorded under it, many relating to anti-Bush posters etc. It may not look bad but it will lead to the TIA (Terrorist Information Act), which will allow the government to monitor anything from our financial records to what we ate last night. It's like 1984. By the way, counted the number of American terrorist deaths in the past few years, excluding 9/11: ZERO.

Interviewer: Is "1984" what will happen in that year?

George Orwell: No, it's a warning. Don't let it happen.

Alas, it is the beginning of the end unless we vote the security hawks out.

by Bob Johnson July 21, 2004

R. Kelly

sexual harrasment

The boy grabbed the other boy who yelled, "Help!! Sexual Harrasment!!, R. Kelly!!!"

by Bob Johnson December 16, 2003

ugs

"United Gay Sluts"

ugs rapes themselves up the ass and or cornhole.

by bob johnson May 2, 2003

skittle

is when u put skittles in water and then when they've lost all they're color, you skit all over tham and give them to someone u hate

HAHAHA you just ate skittles!

by bob johnson May 13, 2005

dmyze

A term describing an individual of uncanny domination and ability in various acpects including the opposite sex, day-to-day tasks, and personal aspirations.

dMyzE is so secsy, I want to be him.

by Bob Johnson June 7, 2003

hugh grant

British actor who adds "erm" in everyone of his lines.

Hooker: Hey wanna suck my tits?
Hugh Grant: Erm, I really erm, would rather suck erm, a penis.
Hooker: Oh you're gay?
Hugh Grant: Erm...yes.

by bob johnson December 11, 2004