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Blenderhead91's definitions

taintular cystosis

(n.) a condition in which one has developed a cyst on one's taint. Eventually, it will surface and drain, usually oozing copious quantities of thick pus. Trust me, this hurts.
Phil: How's the taintular cystosis treating you, Bob?

Bob: I got that fucker drained, dude. The relief...it was better than sex! And what came out of it...looked like a half cup of mashed potatos!

Phil: Dude....gross.
by blenderhead91 April 25, 2010
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crotch floss

(n.) a towel (or other piece of material such as an article of clothing left in the bathroom by a roomie or sibling) purpose-dedicated to drying the area between one's genitals and rectum and the rectum itself (also the region between the scrotum and the thigh). The towel is grasped in one hand in front of the body, and one hand behind and pulled back and forth vigorously, as if flossing one's teeth, but on a larger and smellier scale.

(v.) to floss one's crotch, using a towel as described above. Telltale evidence is usually left on a towel used for crotch flossing: brown skid marks.
Doug used Jane's tanktop as crotch floss, since she insists upon leaving her clothing on the bathroom floor.
by Blenderhead91 April 8, 2009
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crotch crustacean

(n.) a pubic louse; the crabs.
I contracted a case of the crotch crustaceans from the trousers I purchased at the Salvation Army Thrift Store. Of course the old lady just ain't buying it...
by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009
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Non Gratum Anus Rodentum

(Latin) Literally "Not Worth a Rat's Ass," the slogan of the Tunnel Rats, who were either U.S. Army combat engineers or infantrymen of small stature who cleared the extensive tunnel network of the Viet Cong during the Vietnam War.
Willy wore a patch with the saying "Non Gratum Anus Rodentum" on his field jacket. This indicates that he was a Tunnel Rat during 'Nam.
by Blenderhead91 April 7, 2009
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Gerbolocaust

(n.) The mass slaughter of gerbils (typically by suffocation or crushing) attributed to Acadamy Award Winner Richard Gere's ass. Sometimes the mass slaughter of hamsters attributed to Mr. Gere's asshole are also included in this definition.
PETA admits that it's still unclear to this day just how many gerbils Richard Gere killed during the Gerbolocaust. All of the little bodies were never recovered and Mr. Gere has been uncooperative with the investigating organizations.
by Blenderhead91 September 7, 2010
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choadstool

(n.) a despicable person, especially one who is short and fat, much like a choad, a short, fat dick. Choadstoolism may be associated with short man's disease.
That anus up in human resources is a fucking choadstool: four-foot-nine, 200 pounds, and all of it complete, festering dick.
by Blenderhead91 April 8, 2009
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Baptofascist

(n.) A radical authoritarian ideology fusing (usually Southern) Baptist values with extreme right-wing politics. Baptofascists tend to be the sort of (white) folks who put the Rebel Battleflag on their pick-up truck, use the n-word frequently, and believe in the Rapture. They also mininimize women's role ("Cookin' and cleanin' and servin' their husbands every whim"), are vehemently homo-phobic, and aren't shy about approaching total strangers to ask them if they have yet to accept Jesus Christ as their personal savior. All true Baptofascists are registered Republican, of course. All are pro-second ammendment, against gay marriage, and anti-women's reproductive rights. Baptofascists frequently can be found within earshot of an AM radio spewing Rush Limbaugh's philosophy of hate or The Sean Hannity show. They do not, however, listen to Glenn Beck, because he is a Mormon. Mormons are in league with Satan, silly.
I'm more uncomfortable in these briefs than a Baptofascist at a Gay Pride parade.
by Blenderhead91 March 28, 2009
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