14 definitions by Blarny

A digital download system based on auto-updates, friends-lists, and no DRM.

Although not perfect it's a much better option then Gamestop and dealing with the asshole customers rip off resales, cheap ass trade in values that rip you off at every possible opportunity.

Steam was created by valve to sell there products along with indie products and occasionally other stuff. Many people claim that Steam is only around to line valves pockets but really they are just upset by the bugs and mistakes valve made with the program rather then having really issues with it.

Despite it's wonderful usage and application Steam has it's fair share of faults. Mainly slow processing which can delay downloads massively, auto-updates without any notification, and the occasional bugs and glitches.

Despite this Steam is often regarded as a massively useful program and a god send because of it's lack of pointless DRM which most other digital download services are plagued with. It also has often sales which can give a great product away at a great price.
Guy: Steam sucks it's so laggy and never loads an-OH that indie game is on sale for 50% off must buy!

Gabe: Another job well done :D
by Blarny September 8, 2012
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Elves as described by the Dwarves

Elves are smelly, stuck-up, arrogant tree-fondling hippies dedicated to the protection of their concept of nature (focused on trees).

Elven caravans arrive in late spring. During trade, elves will not accept wood, wooden items or any goods decorated with wood.

Elves will, however, gladly trade you their own wooden items. They will not, however, accept their wooden items back. Bunch of hypocritical bastards.

Elven ethics often differ from those of other races. They are likely to be friendly with dwarves, at least until they cut down too many trees. Elves are the only race which wholeheartedly accepts devouring enemy combatants. History shows that an elven combatant will sometimes devour the other person they were fighting when they win. However elves refuse to butcher and consume intelligent beings. Elves find torturing as an example acceptable. To elves, keeping any trophy of any kind is an unthinkable act. Elves allow for killing animals when done in self-defense, and the killing of other elves by an elf is justified if there is an extremely good reason. For elves, the killing of plants is unthinkable. On the other hand, the killing of neutral beings and enemies is acceptable. Elves never offer capital punishment to criminals; instead, elves found to have committed petty crimes are reprimanded, while those convicted of treason, breaking oaths, or participating in slavery are exiled.
Dwarf #1 : Hey why is the elven trade caravan leaving? The outside is swarming with the undead!

Dwarf #2 : One of the children gave the elves a wooden box of diamonds and they refused to stay any longer.

Dwarf #1 : ...want to loot there bodies when they get eaten alive?

Dwarf #2 : I thought you'd never ask friend!
by Blarny July 16, 2012
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A for of heart, lung, stomach, brain, kidney, ect. cancer that can only be contracted from exposure to chrono radiation. Chrono radiation itself can only be found on board and in every nook and cranny of time machines. The truth is time travel is real and possible but will cause super cancer at some point in the travelers life be it immediately after or 12 months before. Due to it's extremely unpredictable nature time travel has been all but outlawed to prevent spread of Super cancer
Doc: Hey martey I went to a rejuvenation clinic. They got me all fixed up change of blood, new kidney, they even cured my super cancer

Marty: Super cancer?

Doc: Yeah, side effect of time travel. Of course you ALWAYS wore your lead-lined suit in the time machine right?

Marty: SHIT
by Blarny December 26, 2011
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The people who constantly try to ban a book, videogame, movie, ect. for not being morally "clean"

These are the kind of people who make the ridiculous (and false) claim that video games are bad, harry potter encourages satanism, and that a nipslip causes permanent damage to anyone who sees it.

Some of them are nothing but trolls who feed of the resulting media coverage.

Most however actually believe there own insane ideas are correct for example fundamentalists and Allen quist

The appropriate response to these people varies based on situation but most of the time it is one of two things either laugh at them or get angry (but only irritated angry not beat down angry) and point out exactly why they are incorrect.

Normally they have impossibly high standards (religion)
or they have found an axe crazy reason to believe something is corrupting there children.
Moral guardians: Down with video games they cause violence suicide and more violence

Normal person: Actually violence per 1000 citizens peaked back in 1982 before doom the first major violent video game was released. For that matter violence has drop by half since then starting directly after violent games started coming into the media.

Moral guardians: Nah, uh our great leader Jack Thompson told us video games is evil.

Normal person: then your a dumbass.
by Blarny August 29, 2012
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Phenomenon where in behavior by unconnected individuals creates a seemingly concentrated effort. This behavior is copied from a previous source without an original.

In short Stand alone complex is multiple copies of a behavior, object, view, ect, existing without an original.
The laughing Man is a living example of Stand Alone Complex.

Not only did hundreds copy his works without knowing who or what he was of there own volition all claiming to be the original.

But he himself was copying a plan found floating the net without any apparent source.
by Blarny September 3, 2012
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Kobold are small dog-man like creatures which live on the fringes of larger civilizations.

Kobold are incapable of farming and make a living by stealing what they can from other civilizations. Compounded with the fact that they are frail to the point of pathetic it's understandable why they often lose there communities or are wiped out entirely.

Living almost exclusively in caves and occasionally small cobbled together villages Kobold maintain a position as the worlds scavengers, stealing small goods from the dead after battles and looting garbage dumping grounds. Occasionally a very lucky, brave, or stupid Kobold may get away with stealing something extremely valuable but this is rare.

The shear ridicule of there abilities has caused some to take pity on them, leaving useless but still useable items outside of there protected stockpiles for Kobold to take.

Something about them also seems to garner some form of pity and feelings of adoration leading to them being referred to as cutebold by people who find there quarks endearing rather then annoying.

There main import is death:There main export is petty annoyance.
Mayor: A Kobold thief managed to sneak into our fort through my river access and stole an artifact platinum goblet that was encrusted with diamonds, rubies and gold. I was pretty pissed at the time but thinking back...that little guy must have become king of the Kobold. The rest of the dwarves sure thought it was ballsy, it became a favorite engraving subject for awhile.
by Blarny August 27, 2012
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Dwarves are the most sturdy race. They are also shorter then most, due to centuries of adaptation to underground homes.

Dwarves are alcohol dependent. They can survive without alcohol but they do slowdown becoming sluggish and grouchy. Dwarves uses alcohol as energy rather then intoxicant. NEVER DRINK WITH DWARVES.

Dwarves love gems & metals and much of there time is spent underground. This can lead to consequences for dwarves who don't get out, mainly cave adaptation.

Dwarves are a friendly race trading with the smelly elves and the humans. Dwarves and Goblins are natural enemies. after seeing each other they will immediately start kicking, punching, and biting each other to death. Dwarves mostly ignore kobold.

Dwarves are a Monarchy. A king who is supreme leader, barons who command regions, and Mayors who rule settlements. All positions can be held by either gender.

Living up to 170 years of age dwarves are very clever building complex traps and tools out of whatever is on hand (rocks)and are the only race afflicted by fay-moods that make them seek out parts to craft items of legendary quality, needs not being met can lead to depression, rage, insanity, and nudism.

Killing animals enemies and plants is ok so long as they are sanctioned. A dwarf committing assault and vandalism are punished. Killing, treason, ect. are punished by death. Lying is a personal matter.
The dwarves of Bad girder where a quick witted bunch with many traps and death machines protecting them but nothing could stop the booze drought.
by Blarny August 27, 2012
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