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Alfie The Horndog's definitions

squeezebox

Momma has a squeezebox she wears on her chest, when daddy comes home he doesn't get no rest, because they're playing all night. And the music's just right. Momma has a squeezebox and daddy doesn't sleep at night!
by Alfie The Horndog March 30, 2006
mugGet the squeezeboxmug.

Boot Camp

A reality show similar to Survivor that was cancelled when people found out that it was rigged.
They don't even show re-runs of Boot Camp.
by Alfie The Horndog March 10, 2007
mugGet the Boot Campmug.

chantese jazz

A light, easy listening form of vocal jazz. Known as chantese because the words are short, descriptive, poetic and sometime repetative. Usually sung by a sexy single female lead.
Female nightclub singers are often classified as chantese jazz artists.
by Alfie The Horndog September 5, 2005
mugGet the chantese jazzmug.

Evelyn Wood

A woman who developed a method for speed reading. Also used as a reference to her popular training method.

The Evelyn Wood speed reading method is a way of reading whole paragraphs at a time, filtering out common words and only look at uncommon words. By only looking at the uncommon words, you get the jist of each paragraph without actually having to read every single word in it.
Oh great! I was just glancing at a review for the movie we were going to see tonight and my Evelyn Wood training kicked in and now it's spoiled for me. So... why don't we just stay in bed instead?
by Alfie The Horndog March 30, 2006
mugGet the Evelyn Woodmug.

Hong Kong dollar

The Hong Kong dollar coin is exactly the same size and weight as the American dollar coin, but the exchange rate makes it worth about 16 cents.

People can use the Hong Kong dollar coin in vending machines that accept American dollar coins! But you can get a $1.25 20 oz soda for about 32 cents and get 75 cents back!

I'm thinking of many money making schemes right now!!
I wonder if it's a federal offense to use the Hong Kong Dollar in a vending machine?
by Alfie The Horndog October 13, 2005
mugGet the Hong Kong dollarmug.

Internet Cop

Someone who exposes internet abusers, virus developers, hackers and posers. Has a wide variety of tricks at their disposal. Often internet cops are ex-hackers trying to go legit by exposing other hackers, etc.
I have to have three layers of hardware encrypted firewall between my LAN and WAN because of all my technically savy enemies. You see, I used to be internet cop.
by Alfie The Horndog September 4, 2005
mugGet the Internet Copmug.

fucktard

Noun. A combination of the word "fuck" (to fornicate) and the word "tard" (to delay). Therefore, a fucktard is a girl who won't let you fornicate with her until like the third or fourth date.
by Alfie The Horndog July 14, 2005
mugGet the fucktardmug.

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