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Ae5Ea8's definitions

speed test

Similar to the speed test used to test your internet connection, but this speed test is used to determine which checkout line is moving faster. It involves a snap judgment as to (1) which checkout clerk looks the least likely to encounter a situation in which they have to call the manager, and (2) which customers are least likely to have some sort of problem at checkout.
I used the speed test at Costco and got burned when the line I changed into was actually slower than the line I moved out of.
by Ae5Ea8 April 5, 2015
mugGet the speed testmug.

Costcop

the Costco worker who checks your receipt as you leave
Costcops pretend to confirm what you've bought.
by Ae5Ea8 February 7, 2015
mugGet the Costcopmug.

raw cheeking

Combination of "raw dogging" and "butt cheeks," describing the act of using a toilet seat, not your own, without protection. The protection in question is toilet paper to line the seat, just as a condom is the protection in question with respect to raw dogging.

It is appropriate to raw cheek in the bathroom of your Immediate and extended family. How far the circle extends to your friends, however, is unclear at this time. At a best friend's house, it is acceptable to raw cheek. The further you get into the realm of a casual acquaintance, though, the more likely it is that you should use toilet paper to line the toilet seat.

Without exception, it is never appropriate to raw cheek in a restroom open to the public.
The old saw goes: Saturday night raw cheeking leads to Monday morning rash.
by Ae5Ea8 March 9, 2015
mugGet the raw cheekingmug.

fingature

Writing your signature on a trackpad with your finger.
My fingature looks nothing like my real signature.
by Ae5Ea8 April 28, 2015
mugGet the fingaturemug.

shit list

The short list of people you would feel comfortable talking to while simultaneously dropping a deuce.
I often ponder my shit list in the Starbucks bathroom.
by Ae5Ea8 January 10, 2016
mugGet the shit listmug.

Home Depotpourri

The beguiling smell of a Home Depot. The strongest notes are fresh cut lumber, lawn fertilizer, and WD-40.
The ladies seem to dig it when I burn a candle scented with Home Depotpourri.
by Ae5Ea8 October 30, 2015
mugGet the Home Depotpourrimug.

get my green drink on

Similar to "getting my drink on," but instead of alcohol it's a "green drink"—like a superfood drink made with spirulina, kale, chlorella, or wheatgrass.
by Ae5Ea8 May 10, 2015
mugGet the get my green drink onmug.

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