Ae5Ea8's definitions

speed test

Similar to the speed test used to test your internet connection, but this speed test is used to determine which checkout line is moving faster. It involves a snap judgment as to (1) which checkout clerk looks the least likely to encounter a situation in which they have to call the manager, and (2) which customers are least likely to have some sort of problem at checkout.

I used the speed test at Costco and got burned when the line I changed into was actually slower than the line I moved out of.

by Ae5Ea8 April 5, 2015

ad-censed

Combination of Google's "Ad Sense" and "incensed" (meaning angry or irritated), describing inappropriate internet ads that you feel shouldn't be targeted at you.

Dude, wtf? Why are you getting ads for ladies jeans?

Bro. No idea. I'm simply ad-censed!

by Ae5Ea8 February 26, 2015

abromatherapy

when a male enjoys his own bathroom stench

One man's abromatherapy is another man's disgusting stench

by Ae5Ea8 October 24, 2016

satisfriction

Any sexually gratifying friction performed on oneself or another.

Hey, do you want to come over tonight? We can work on our physics homework to calculate the coefficient of satisfriction between our fiddly bits.

Sorry, I'm not into you that way.
Oh, well, I guess I shall be satisfricting myself.

by Ae5Ea8 February 7, 2015

kerfuffle butter

Combination of "truffle butter" and "kerfuffle," meaning any life situation in which shit is really messed up and in total disarray.

How's your job going, bro?

Dude, it's total kerfuffle butter right now at my job: Paychecks are late, the VP is thinking of quitting, someone just filed a lawsuit against the company, and customers are bailing by the boatloads.

by Ae5Ea8 April 7, 2015

ascetiquette

Combination of "ascetic" and "etiquette," describing the act of denying yourself the pleasure of eating your meal at it's peak hotness until everyone at the restaurant table gets served their meal.

One observes ascetiquette on business lunch until told otherwise. - Emily Post

by Ae5Ea8 June 26, 2016

Cape Code

A computer programming language invented on Cape Cod, Massachusetts.

I live in a house down by the sea in Cape Code.

by Ae5Ea8 February 3, 2015