AKACroatalin's definitions

Rectalgia

Rectalgia is a medical term meaning a pain in the rectum. You can see where this is going, it can be usefully applied to people who are a pain in the arse, you know the WOSPs, Malcolms and fuckwits of the world. See also pygalgia.

There are some people whose mere existence causes acute rectalgia.

by AKACroatalin February 23, 2017

Barbarism

The condition of having no civilizing influences or refined culture; ignorance or crudity; savage violence or cruelty.

With their gun culture, Americans never really outgrew barbarism.

by AKACroatalin April 13, 2015

Nomophobe

A nomophobe is a person suffering from nomophobia. You know the people I mean, the ones with a mobile phone stuck to their ear. If they aren’t talking on it they’re fiddling with it in some bizarre form of electronic masturbation. If they stop for more than five seconds, a strange glazed look comes over them, starting at their eyes but gradually taking over their whole face until they either start chattering rubbish to somebody or fiddling with the thing like Nero on steroids. When you next see one take a really good look as they are a dying species, too busy playing with their phones to breed.

Nomophobe, a sad act constantly pissing about with a mobile phone.

by AKACroatalin April 28, 2015

Decency

Decency is a noun and can have two distinct meanings:
1. Behaviour that conforms to accepted standards of morality or respectability.
2. Things required for a reasonable standard of life.

1. One example of decency is not calling people with a learning disability rug munchers.
2. In one sense, you do need money for decency.

by AKACroatalin February 26, 2017

Dorkelfie

Literally a selfie taken by someone who is a dork. The ultimate destination for these pictures is social media and the people who take them are usually insecure, self-obsessed, self-aggrandising sad acts with no real friends. Oh dear! I think I may just have described a significant proportion of Facebook users.

From one perspective, any selfie is a dorkelfie.

by AKACroatalin April 22, 2015

Healeish

Not to be confused with hellish, healish is English slang derived from the word heale, it is an adjective used to describe someone whose behaviour is that of a total tosser, waste of space or OIC. They are the sort of people for whom arsehole is too kind a name, who are narcissistic crawlers with little in the way of either intelligence or talent. Avoid them at all costs as their proximity will bring on attacks of acute nausea.

"Have you seen what that healeish wanker has done?"

by AKACroatalin March 31, 2015

Renifleur

A renifleur is someone, can be male or female, with a medical condition that gives them sexual pleasure from smells. It doesn’t result in them being slightly turned on, but clothes off, into bed, or even the nearest patch of grass, and get it on. The condition can be triggered by a particular smell, usually quite specific and forming part of a fragrance, but in very rare cases it can be triggered by ordinary, everyday, common smells which means that the person must be kept in a sterile, odour-free environment. Surprisingly, many people exhibit a toned down version of this trait which is why males and females can be more sexually receptive when a certain perfume or aftershave is used.

Have you smelled the stench coming off Malcolm? He's enough to make the most ardent renifleur get a gas mask!

by AKACroatalin February 27, 2019