AKACroatalin's definitions

WOFS

English acronym standing for Waste Of Fucking Space. Can be Waste Of Flipping Space if you want to be a bit more polite but is used to describe people who are just that. The ones that seem to have no useful contribution to make to the human race or anything else and make you wonder just where evolution went wrong.

"Malcolm's just been sat on his ass all day, hasn't done a fucking thing except feed his face and drink tea. He hasn't so much as lifted a finger even though the rest of us are run ragged."
"What a WOFS!"

by AKACroatalin March 13, 2015

Lunting

Lunting is a verb meaning to walk around while smoking a pipe. Tobacco was first brought to Europe by the Spanish in 1528 and the word ‘lunting’ is almost as old, first appearing somewhere around 1540 – 1550. Lunting is what pipe smokers do as a means of stress relief or to relax although it should be remembered that in large quantities tobacco can be hallucinogenic and the exercise will increase respiration rate, heart rate and may speed the absorption of any hallucinogens.

Additional meanings for lunting are emitting smoke or steam from a pipe and lighting a fire, torch or tobacco pipe. The word itself comes from either the Dutch word 'lont' meaning a slow match or fuse or the Middle Low German 'lonte' meaning a wick.

"Where’s Charlie?”
“Dunno. He’s got hold of some really strong baccy and said he was goin’ lunting.”

by AKACroatalin January 2, 2016

Fart Fact 13

Holding in a fart won’t harm you. You're not going to explode or damage your gut, but sooner or later your body is going to get rid of that gas, so why not consider letting it go when it will have the most effect.

“Mikey got slung out of church!”
“Why?”
“Well, he knew fart fact 13 and was holding one in. The vicar got up to do the sermon and his text was from Proverbs, ‘I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes and cinnamon’ and Mikey let it go!”
“What happened?”
“Half of the people were outraged and half were pissing themselves, and Mikey got slung out.”

by AKACroatalin November 1, 2019

Rectalgia

Rectalgia is a medical term meaning a pain in the rectum. You can see where this is going, it can be usefully applied to people who are a pain in the arse, you know the WOSPs, Malcolms and fuckwits of the world. See also pygalgia.

There are some people whose mere existence causes acute rectalgia.

by AKACroatalin February 23, 2017

All talk and no action

All talk and no action is a description that can be applied to the chattering classes, certain politicians, incompetent managers, just about anyone who talks a lot, usually rubbish or irrelevancies, about a problem or situation but does sod all to resolve it. It can also be applied to males or females who talk a lot about sex, but when it comes down to getting physical run a mile

“How did you get on with that bird from HR last night?”
“Waste of time, all talk and no action.”

by AKACroatalin June 9, 2015

Neology

It is a noun with at last four meanings:
1 The study or art of creating new words.
2 The act of introducing a new word into a language.
3 The use of an existing word in a new way.
4 The holding of novel or rational religious views. (Although this definition is now largely obsolete.)

1 Neology is a hobby of mine.
2 I’ve just had a new word accepted by the Oxford English Dictionary. Neology!
3 Urban Dictionary is a catalyst for neology
4 Believing that we are all just the dream of a sleeping cat is not necessarily a neology.

by AKACroatalin April 20, 2015

Dorkelfie

Literally a selfie taken by someone who is a dork. The ultimate destination for these pictures is social media and the people who take them are usually insecure, self-obsessed, self-aggrandising sad acts with no real friends. Oh dear! I think I may just have described a significant proportion of Facebook users.

From one perspective, any selfie is a dorkelfie.

by AKACroatalin April 22, 2015