The expression, "I wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire" suggests a very strong hatred for an individual. Often when it is used, someone who hates the person even more comes back with "I wouldn't shit on him if he was on fire", thinking this takes the hate level a step further.
However they are mistaken. Shit, poop or jobbies wouldn't help put the fire out (unlike piss) so in fact by shitting on someone who is on fire you are adding insult to injury, as well as creating a more interesting incident scene for the fire department investigators.
It's important if you are taking a dump on an on-fire person not to let any bits of wee-wee come out as this might put the fire out. Also try to poop from a safe height to avoid charring your back-bottom or your dangly bits/front-bottom. You might also want to try to squeeze it slowly so that the on-fire person can see it coming out and have that as their final vision of life.
However they are mistaken. Shit, poop or jobbies wouldn't help put the fire out (unlike piss) so in fact by shitting on someone who is on fire you are adding insult to injury, as well as creating a more interesting incident scene for the fire department investigators.
It's important if you are taking a dump on an on-fire person not to let any bits of wee-wee come out as this might put the fire out. Also try to poop from a safe height to avoid charring your back-bottom or your dangly bits/front-bottom. You might also want to try to squeeze it slowly so that the on-fire person can see it coming out and have that as their final vision of life.
Andrew: "That Tony is a complete arsehole: I wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire"
Gary: "Fuck, I wouldn't shit on him if he was on fire"
Andrew: "Actually I would: I'd drop a big chocolate Mr Whippy right on his face. I'd also stuff his pockets with newspaper soaked in gasoline. Bastard."
Gary: "Fuck, I wouldn't shit on him if he was on fire"
Andrew: "Actually I would: I'd drop a big chocolate Mr Whippy right on his face. I'd also stuff his pockets with newspaper soaked in gasoline. Bastard."
by fluchter1996 June 08, 2011
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A phrase used to say that you strongly wish to stay out of the way of an argument/heavy situation and not have any involvement.
Employee: I caught Debra and Jeff having sex in the office, what the hell are they thinking?
Boss: Err, I wouldn't touch that with a 20-foot pole.
Boss: Err, I wouldn't touch that with a 20-foot pole.
by Corey_Faure January 19, 2011
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A female that is repulsively skanky/ugly.
Not only would you never sleep with her, being 10 feet away is still too close.
Not only would you never sleep with her, being 10 feet away is still too close.
by Diego November 12, 2003
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by Studly Hungwell October 19, 2006
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You can never know with her.
by kriszta June 05, 2006
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Implies that the previously stated is rigged; local wrestling promoter, as told by Jim Cornette, gave away a pony to increase ticket sales and, to avoid losing money, rigged the raffle to ensure his son would win the pony
by Jack_Bongos January 15, 2020
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Used to describe something that has no value, doesn't taste good, doesn't look good, doesn't work and is inferior.
"Have you heard the new XYZ CD?" Matt asked Janine.
"Yup. Sucks. I wouldn't use it to hit a dog on the ass." Janine replied.
"Yup. Sucks. I wouldn't use it to hit a dog on the ass." Janine replied.
by bingo lingo August 29, 2010
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