'that fit bloke is married'
'wat is the neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed'

'your mom is battered'
'wat is the need for such abuse?'

' my train was late, a dog urinated on my shoes and my bag was nicked - there really is no need.' (an example of a slight variation - for use only once the original expression has been mastered.)

Bro since I got dirtpilled on Tuesday I have made sooo many worm friends and made them soo many little houses to get married in. Me? Lonely? No you’re the lonely one u lawn owning freak