1. Frankly incredible mash up of noise, jungle, shouting, breaks, unidentified breaking objects and Stevie Wonder on ketamine driving at 400mph down the M1 projectile vomiting to the sound of his own music played at 10 times the normal speed. Venetian Snares has managed to capture the essence of some of the world's most violent massacres and translate them into a whole funk collector's collection worth of number one break core hits! Absolutely imperative listening.

2. Simply put, the greatest electronic music artist ever, comparable to
Jesus Christ in skill, although in unrelated fields of work.

3. a.k.a. Aaron Funk

It’s an acronym standing for Can’t Remember A Fucking Thing. It’s usually used to describe embarrassment at being unable to remember someone (CRAFT moment); going onstage as the lead in the latest theatrical performance and your mind goes completely blank (CRAFT situation); the next morning after a night when you got pissed as a fart and woke up in bed cuddling a traffic cone and a string of fairy lights wound round your prick.

Sure, it sounds like dumpsters fucking, but it sounds so good!

A drum made in Venice.

Venetians Snares makes truly unique music. It's good if you're high at the time, or partially drunk. Yes, partially. It isn't very bad... but it isn't very good either. Most of the songs sound rushed... Maybe a little to crazy for my taste.