such and such is a tampon

my vagina is so bleeding i am putting a tampon in it

"I just cut my arm, it is bleeding very badly, do you have a spare tampon?"

Mmmm.. yum give me more tampons bro

Ted: Did Daniel get kicked out of the Marines? Because he has a full beard now.

Bill: Oh, no he's a tampon, so he has to shave one weekend a month and two weeks in the summer.

"Shit, stop being a tampon!" or " I cant stand it when you come in here and disrupt me when I am in the flow, stop being a tampon!"

M: Honey lets have sex

F: We can't this week i'm on the rag

M: Fart!! tampons are the ultimate fun sponge