The slow dump is when you have been on one date and are not feeling him or her anymore. Perhaps the banging was sub par. Whatever. First you slow down the amount of phone calls per day or week, and miss a few. Week two, fade from phone calls to just texting and then towards week three miss a few texts. Week four, miss more texts and then with the ones you do respond, use one word answers, and say things like I could but whatever, or ya I could do that but ya know. Weeks can also be replaced with days, and days with hours, to speed up answer with minimal words and if this doesn't work, just talk about lots of the fadees friends that you would like to hammer, or be hammered by depending on the sex of the slow dumper.

When you eat dirt for the first time and leave your family to build a shack in the woods