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Something which is cunning and clever and very useful, note. does not have to be an actual crime. Or it can be anything you want , i dont really care myself , i think ill grab myself a beer,yehay yay, shut up, no one likes youy
Jimmy:hey guys i just got a free balloon cus i sed it was my birthday, he he the perfect crime
by Jimmy Burgess October 30, 2005
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Dwight: What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years; she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
Friend 1 : Hey! You won't believe this. Last Night, I did the Perfect Crime
Friend 2 : Holy Shit! Like in The Office?
Friend 1 : Yeah, pretty cool, right?
by macabre_brooder May 22, 2018
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What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning, the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
by oof_man27 December 11, 2019
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A crime which has no recourse against the perpetrator, however it is certainly not a victimless crime. It's virtue comes from the victim's inability to provide coherent testimony.
GHB and a Nixon mask, ahh the perfect crime! Good Luck testifying cupcake!
by dirTsamoan June 30, 2003
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Dwight: What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No, I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later, I get a postcard. I have a son and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris, by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years; she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
Johnny: I have just done the perfect crime!
Timmy: Wait like the one from the office?!?
Johnny: Yes Timmy, soon we will become millionaires.
by busterbitch June 11, 2020
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Any type of crime that was planned out so well, it's impossible to find out the culprit.
The guy who stole my case yesterday had probably been planning it out for a long time, it really was the perfect crime!
by rxwan? May 17, 2020
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Pooping in the work bathroom stalls without anyone realising it was you.
Someone came in to pee while I was pooping at work yesterday, so I stall stalled until he left. Perfect crime!
by awdammit March 2, 2012
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