A Hummer is an enormous vehicle that was designed to go off-road, although they are mostly driven by highly-paid executives (see yuppie) who need to drive a big vehicle to compensate for something smaller. Sometimes purchased by people who like to go off road, or by mothers who have a lot of kids and need something big to bring them around in, but mainly purchased by yuppies who need something to say that they make more money than you do. Hummer drivers are generally assholes who will cut you off given the chance, and won't hesitate to flip you off should you cut them off back. Hummers rarely see any dirt, except when their owners park them in the yard of their 3-story, 5-bedroom house.
Person A: "I just got a promotion, with a double salary! I'm going to use the extra money to buy a Hummer."
Person B: *dropkicks Person A*
by TheAmazingNacho June 9, 2009
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n. what you and all the other soccer moms will have to start doing to pay the gas bill for your ginormous SUV. Pucker up, beeyotch.
by miss_mae September 12, 2003
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1.Big gas guzzler 4x4 that was used to carry 8 or 10 military personnel but now americans buy them in order that they themselves will be able to fit inside given their enormous flab to body tissue ratio. Are used to state that the person is big (in more ways than one) and that they can afford to waste millions of $ on a vehicle that does about 1/4 of a mile per gallon.

2.Stupid overly-patriotic american blowjob in which the unfortunate female (or often male) to be subjected to the tedious and mundane task of first finding the man's tiny cock under the mass of flab then puts it in their mouth and sucks it whilst humming the star spangled banner, causing the tiny vibration in his or her lips to increase the pleasure induced by roughly 0.000000001%.
1. Oh, normal cars are so hard to get into - the amount of space you get is only 1 metre wide! I'll buy a hummer. And i'll add my kids in there to add more weight so it goes faster and is more fuel efficient.

2. How apt is this - the act of singing the American national anthem while sucking a fat man's cock and making him ejaculate all over your face. God bless America.
by snack88 August 4, 2005
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A vehicle driven by stuck-up wealthy people for leisure, or by people who need to drive over rugged terrain. A cheap rip-off of the military Humvee. The $50,000-ish Hummer H2 is more popular than the $120,000 Hummer H1.
Haha, look at that moron in the Hummer. Doubt he ever actually uses it on rough terrain, that poor fuck.
by Anonymous August 16, 2003
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A spasticated, wannabe, faggotmobile civilian copycat military vehicle.
''Damn lad, what the fuck you doing in that? Where'dya nick it? The RAF base? You fuckin pussy!''
by rafa May 6, 2003
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1. A stupid ugly piece of shit of an SUV driven by brain-dead soccer-moms and pathetic richboys who'd crap their pants if they ever drove off-road. Some are even given dubs and other idiotic crapola. Usually these pieces of shit can be found in the parking lots of malls and starbucks.

2. A blowjob
1. 10 bucks that hummer only sees off-road when that dumb bitch backs into a flowerbed.

2. Mary gave me a damn good hummer last night.
by Dennisisevil October 19, 2005
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A completely worthless gas pig piece of crap. A status symbol built for armchair soldiers and idiots who are trying to look cool.
A Hummer sucks gas, sucks crap, and sucks dirt. They suck.
by AntiGop May 13, 2005
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