The topic at hand.

when you're hungover as shit after a spending a night drunk as a skunk

First you need a bottle of tequila. preferably Jose. proceed to drink at least half. plus as much beer as you can find. go out with the hottest girls you can find but DO NOT touch them whatsoever. once intoxicated pretend to be blind act as retarded as you can. once all of your alcohol supply is gone then you should make your journey home. never take the shortest easiest route. start as many fights as you can along the way and when you finally make it home be sure to piss on your roommates' couch and eat all of their shit. repeat weekly