A dog,usually of the Irish Wolfhound breed. They are fed tumours, which lodge in their throat, causing them to fail to make any sound except grumbling guttural noises. Snobbish hounds appear to be smothered in tar and are commonly mistaken for toxic chemical spills. Their hind legs are nearly alway broken (should they be born with any) and they are bred by Captain BigglesWorth, the happy-go-lucky homeless millionaire with a knack for destroy anything he touches, physically, mentally and spiritually.

When you eat dirt for the first time and leave your family to build a shack in the woods