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A solo version of a blumpkin usually performed by jerkin it while taking a dump. It is usually performed by a Cringelord to the memory of some unrequited love. If the performer is short a couple ribs, either through surgical means or birth defect, may also be done full-simulation style.
Person A: Hey man, where did Cringelord go? he isn't bothering your friend again is he? I mean he's been after her so long when she's made it clear she just isn't that into him.

Person B: Nah, he just went to take a dump.

Person A: Oh, so he's doing a simulated blumpkin?

Person B: Yup...
by evilleppy June 13, 2020
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Jun 3 Word of the Day
When the “crush” has no intentions of taking things further, but they like the attention. So they flirt here or there, send dm/texts just to keep the person interested, knowing damn well they’re staying single.
Danielle was so flirty the other night, he messaged me 3 times just to say hello, I think he’s coming around.

No Susan he’s breadcrumbing you just so you’ll keep nibbling at his heels.
by Briness March 15, 2018
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