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A shwank is the very precise art of having a shit and a wank at the same time such that you come at both ends at the same time causing you to pass out.

Also known as schwank.
Julian was found in a such a mess on the toilet. He must have had a Shwank
by Jizz_Staines April 01, 2008
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Aug 11 Word of the Day
A phrase to describe someone who is cognitively degenerating. Synonym of "going off the deep end". Can have varying degrees of severity.

Reference to the song "Hey You" by Pink Floyd. The line "and the worms ate into his brain" makes no sense in an otherwise linear and literal narration throughout the lyrics.
"My boyfriend has a total case of brain worms. He told me the cat was bugged so the Feds could listen in on us having sex..."

or

"You totally stumbled over that entire sentence. Can't speak English all of a sudden? What, do you have brain worms?"
by _Jez_ October 03, 2009
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3
to simultanously hang a shit and to wank (masterbate).
fuck yeah do it all the time,lowers your chance of getting prostate cancer by fifty percent,yeah fuck yeah shwanking is the way to go!
by Browning Smears November 15, 2003
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4
another meaning for "sweet" positive notation
Wow! That is shwank!
by Blythe October 29, 2004
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5
the easiest way to communicate that you think something is awesome .
that was shwank!!!
Yeah! that was so cool my balls switched places!!!!
by reallywhite May 06, 2011
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6
A object that is the cross between a sword and a shank.
1. She used her shwank to kill the alien because it was small enough to hide.
by noobinator12 November 23, 2010
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