Not quite a professional football player. Semi pro football teams are made up of these fatties that used to play in high school, but have since let themselves go. On the field, they enjoy slamming their waists into one another with the secondary goal of moving a football shaped ball around. Off the field, they enjoy wearing extremely tight wife beaters that have the American Gladiators logo on them while wearing tiny shorts. They have to eat every thirty minutes, or they might lose weight, so they buy processed canned meats that smell terrible and snack away even at work.
When something funny is heard, the semi pro football player incorrectly repeats what he heard while laughing.
Semi pro football players enjoy company while using the bathroom, so if they spot someone of the same sex taking off his watch to go take a dump, the SPFP is almost sure to follow so that he can enjoy the flatulence of the co-dumper.
SPFPs also enjoy flinging crap around the bathroom stall, drawing a picture of it, and then telling everyone that "someone missed the seat in the bathroom." It is really the S.P.F.P. that did it, though, because it is hard to tell where the anus is when the buttocks has such a large surface area.

The safeguarding of Earth and other worlds from biological cross-contamination (i.e. billionaires with too much time on their hands).

Also known as “planetary protection.” Planetary protection / quarantine “reflects both the unknown nature of the space environment and the desire of the scientific community to preserve the pristine nature of celestial bodies until they can be studied in detail.”

There are two types of interplanetary contamination. Forward contamination is the transfer of viable organisms from Earth to another celestial body. Back contamination is the transfer of extraterrestrial organisms, if such exist, back to the Earth's biosphere.