I met this gal in a bar in Soho. She was hot and I was going to ask her back to my place, though it turns out she started talking about her kids, then her wife. It turns out that she is a rug mumcher - the chick loves to mow box and is the mum of two.

Dude, I was so unhappy about my girl, until I spoke to my serotonin donor who really helped me feel better