A phrase that's used when a friend is acting flaky about attending an event or outing. They either hesitate or don't make an effort to follow through with their intentions.

This can be used to enforce their need to come out with you.

To masterbate. Taken from the popular sketch comedy show Cheppelle's Show. The sketch refered to involved a man's Granny walking in on him masterbating in the bathroom.

Can be used as an exclamation to warn someone that you're spanking the monkey, or used as a verb.

A sputnik is a guy who orbits around a woman, pretending to be her friend, with the ulterior and covert motive of becoming her lover.

Sputnik is a reference to the first artificial Earth satellite. Similar to the satellite that orbits Earth, the guy orbits the female friend, hoping for more. Therefore, he is an orbital.

Literally translating to Don't be a Dick. Trust me, nobody wants an exposed Richard unless asked for.

a fun phrase used when a friend is sneezing/coughing up a storm or is just in a general state of mild sickness.

although it may be used in place of "I hope you feel better" or "I'm sorry you're sick", it functions more properly as "get better soon because your sickness is grossing me out"

First coined by The Monarch in the wildly popular Venture Brothers cartoon, this is a figurative sarcastic list which has events and tasks that are totally lame and simply unwanted.

When someone is irritating you/doing something negative to you but you ain't having any of it.
Similar to "can you not", i.e. piss off