What you should do when you are over 60. This makes sure that you wont get on each others nerves for very long.
by ItsMillyTime August 02, 2007
The point at which the friendship with your sweetheart ends and becomes a business relationship.
The point at which you stop having fun and take on responsibility for yourself and your new wife.
The end of your life as you once knew it.
The point at which you stop having fun and take on responsibility for yourself and your new wife.
The end of your life as you once knew it.
Marriage is a lot like playing cards.
You start out giving a heart and a diamond, and end up wishing for a club and a spade.
You start out giving a heart and a diamond, and end up wishing for a club and a spade.
by Markwonder January 10, 2011
For many, the phase of a relationship in which delight turns to disappointment and romance turns to resentment. Then she turns to her girlfriends and he turns to drink. Presently they turn on each other. He turns to a mistress, she to a divorce lawyer. Their home turns into hers but their mortgage turns into his. The sons turn into junkies, the daughters into teenage moms. And that's the bright side, because in many cases that's as close to a turn-on as marriage gets. Unless you're very, very, VERRRRY careful, and willing to wait and wait and WAAAAIIIIIIT for a truly exceptional person to enter your life, AND for real love between you to grow. A marriage founded on that rock-solid basis still has only a 50/50 chance of success (i.e. boredom) or failure (i.e. the tragedy described above), because marriage often changes people, leaving you shackled to a stranger. Yet that's as good as life's going to get, kid. Suddenly the Navy doesn't sound so bad, does it?
by Stranded in Paradise February 06, 2008
by Ecliptic November 22, 2003
1)The root cause of divorce.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
2)The most successful wealth transfer scheme ever invented.
3)A contract-that if presented to you by an agent/lawyer-would
be sufficient grounds for a legal malpractice suit.
4)One sure way that the state can stay involved in your
life.FOREVER.
5)The point at which regular good sex stops...and infrequent
sex for procreation,manipulation,and/or passive-aggressive
destruction begins.
6)An institution that should be scrapped in favor of 1-3-5
year contracts...Not that you'll be any happier.
by L.MARTIN July 05, 2006
To most people, it begins with a grand confetti-filled ceremony, but sadly, usually ends in divorce and the like.
So, taking contemporary relevance into consideration, Perhaps the most accurate definition of 'marriage' is:
"I know im crazy in love with you right now, but when these high emotions leave and it's just you and me left, I promise that I'm going to stay with you, belong to you, protect you and love you... I wont leave you or break this promise (even if you do bore me sometimes down the track)."
So, taking contemporary relevance into consideration, Perhaps the most accurate definition of 'marriage' is:
"I know im crazy in love with you right now, but when these high emotions leave and it's just you and me left, I promise that I'm going to stay with you, belong to you, protect you and love you... I wont leave you or break this promise (even if you do bore me sometimes down the track)."
by Angelface May 11, 2006
Marriage is that wonderful time in the lives of two people where they demonstrate their love and devotion to each other. After the ceremony, the new couple will go somewhere nice to bang. Then it all goes to Jahannam. First wifey will quit work to watch Lifetime (one of many Feminazi channels). Then she will slip up and spill the truth about why she was a virgin going to the honeymoon destination and wasn't when they first fucked. Then it will come to light that she was under a mountain of debt from Payday loan(sharks) and keep bitching until he gets a second, or third, job. Then he'll have to get out some payday loans to pay her payday loans or even less sex for him. Then, while he's working all the time, she'll be banging the mailman, her boyfriend, the cable guy, the internet guy, and any other guy but her hubby. This hell goes on for about two years. Then comes the blissful stage known as divorce. This is the time the truth comes out (the shit hit the fan when they left for their honeymoon) and she bitches about how she "had" to fuck everyone but her dearest husband since he abused and neglected her, working when he should have been home. After that torment, comes the alimony stage. So in the end, he's got 25% of his paycheck, none of the account (she got to it first), and just enough for a shack downtown and a tranny hooker (all the real girls were her best friends and probably coworkers). Meanwhile lil' wifey will have two new husbands and countless fuck buddies. Have fun.
In short, marriage is the worst ass fucking possible.
Usually.
(p.s. This actually happened to my dad)
Usually.
(p.s. This actually happened to my dad)
by WTF Mate? May 15, 2007