A libertarian is someone who wants to take America back to the way it was run in the 1800s, regardless of how much the world has changed since then. Libertarians also have mean hard-ons for unregulated capitalism, believing that the "Invisible Hand" will erase poverty and create a utopia instead of what ACTUALLY happens when you let companies do whatever they want, which is:

-Children working in factories and mines
-Corporate monopolies
-Workplaces where death is likely
-Low, low wages
-Shit in your food (Read Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle")
-Even more extreme corporate corruption and political pawns than we have now.
-Getting the living fuck stomped out of you by company-hired goons for trying to organize a union (Battle of the Overpass)

1. Someone who thinks Somalia is a nice place to live.
2. One who thinks Ayn Rand is a good writer and isn't crazy.
3. Delves into the archives of history to base an ideology off of Industrial Age Europe in much the same way conservatives do medieval England.
4. One who thinks the free market should decide whether or not it's okay to force your children to work in African mines doing backbreaking labor, inhaling toxic fumes and whatnot for eight cents an hour.

A party of people who claim they take the best beliefs of both liberals and conservatives to form the perfect party.
Yet at the same time, if in power, they would merge the special and normal Olympics and have the losers beaten to death with copies of Atlas Shrugged.

In the classical sense an individual who favors liberty either in the service of society against tyranny or because the state has no compelling interest in certain behaviors.

In the contemporary sense, A stupid high school white boy who lives off if his parents and has never had anything bad happen to him.

A Republican who wants to get high and look at porn.

Someone who believes that the government is evil but giant corporations would never do anything bad.
Someone who believes that a company's right to make money is more important than the people's right to breathe.
Someone who gets indignant when I kick him in the nuts for blowing smoke in my face.
Someone ranting about the government, usually from the back of a cop car.
The grown up (sort of) equivalent of a kid punching his fist in the air and saying "if you get hit it's your own fault."
Someone too stupid to whack off and pass gas at the same time.

A person who believes there should be no government at all because they don't want to pay taxes. In order to support this view libertarians insist the government is completely corrupt and incapable while they use demonizing tactics against those who use or who are likely to use government programs intended to combat starvation and poverty, usually the poor and disabled. However, it's impossible to find a libertarian who will refuse government aid when they themselves become poor or disabled. This is because libertarians understand they are due reparations for the theft of their tax dollars, as is spelled out in the sacred governmental domination instruction manual known as the Constitution.