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1. noun. a person who is descended from a jew (mother or father, does not matter, apparently a lot of jews don't even know this)
2. noun. a person who practices judaism
3. noun. a person who considers themselves a 'member of the tribe' (the 12 tribes, all desdended from Abraham). there are people who consider themselves ethnically, socially, and/or culturally jewish though they do not practice judaism. Jews refer to non-jews as 'gentiles.'


4. verb. to cheat someone, to get someone down on their price, to be stingy
No one in our family actually practices judaism, though we are aware of our roots and celebrate several jewish holidays, Hannukah, purim, etc.. sort of like a lot of christians celebrate christmas but don't go to church....
by itsstuckinmymouth March 22, 2009
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A member of the Jewish faith or ethnicity. According to their own tradition, the Jews are said to have escaped from slavery in Egypt. According to both Roman (notably Tacitus) and Egyptian (notably Manetho) historians of antiquity, however, the Jews descended from Egyptian lepers (referring both to those actually suffering from leprosy as well as troublesome elements in society) that were expelled from Egypt to live in the desert, much like the British sent their fringe elements to the colonies. The Jewish people are said to have formed much of their culture in reaction to the Egyptians and as a result of the peculiarities surrounding their banishment. Some traditions they continued from Egypt, such as the burial of the dead and the belief in the importance of the physical body for resurrection. Other times they intentionally developed traditions in opposition to the Egyptians—in part as a result of their resenting their banishment. Tacitus points to their sacrificing of oxen, which the Egyptians associated with the god Apis, as well as of rams, a symbol associated with Amun. As for traditions resulting as peculiarities from the banishment, he suggests that their refraining from swine related to their having been plagued by leprosy (as pigs are prone to this in the desert), their frequent fasts to their wandering without food, and their unleavened bread to their hurried acquisition of corn. Perhaps more significant examples of traditions formed opposite to those of the Egyptians and in accordance with the material conditions of their time of wandering would be commands against graven images and the worship of multiple deities. Their refraining from the use of material images or symbolism may be a result of the fact that they 1) in their poverty resented and could not compete with the Egyptians and so inverted the value to feel themselves justified and 2) in their sickness could not stand to associate divinity with anything a part of the material or temporal world. Another example is their obsession with the idea that God has only one form and face and their taking as antithetical any conception of divinity other than their own tribal deity—as opposed to the Egyptian belief that Amun-Ra, the formless all-powerful creator behind the universe, had many manifestations. Judaism may have started out an Egyptian-lite religion, the elaborate pantheon of the Egyptians being too complicated for the new and wandering tribe and the need for a return to the essential and basic having taken hold. The line from the Bible “Yet I am the LORD thy God from the land of Egypt, and thou shalt know no god but me: for there is no saviour beside me” (Hosea 13:4) may have a completely different meaning than that usually assumed. Yet this is not the complete story, as it fails to take into consideration the influence of the Levantine pantheon on the formation of the Jewish tribal deity. An Egyptian inscription from 1390-1352 BCE mentions the “Shasu of Yhw”, the Shasu being a nomadic people from the Levant region and Yhw being their (or one of their) god(s). See YHWH for more details.
There are many proud Jews--a beautiful people with a rich cultural heritage who have survived many hard times.
by Freiheit November 26, 2005
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Abbreviation for Jeweller's Orb. A currency item used in ARPG Path of Exile to change the amount of holes your piece of equipment has.
My item needs more holes so I bought 300 Jews for 1 Exalted Orb
by 32121 August 06, 2016
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5
Junior Enlisted Warrior. In the Marine Corps grades E-1 through E-3. The working class.
Corporal "bring me the jews"
Other corporal " why lift with your back when you can lift with your lance corporals"
by CapDaddyLaFlame August 10, 2016
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6
Anyone who a gentile decides is Jewish is a Jew. It doesn't matter whether they practice Judaism or have never entered a synagogue. Since the birth of Christianity, being a Jew means to be personally responsible for the death of a rabbi named Joshua, better known through his name in Greek, Jesus Christ. The New Testament takes what was largely a political dispute with a renegade rabbi while Judea, a Roman province, was under military occupation and turns it into a blood libel with no expiration date. A Jew born today will be considered by the gentile world responsible for the death of Jesus. Since Jews have historically been persecuted dating from their dispersion by Rome in 70 AD and thereafter by the Christian world, they are understandably mistrusting of non-Jews, fiercely independent and have learned that education is the only commodity which is truly one's own in any event. Jews are characterized by an excess of pessimism, while they await the next Holocaust and a wicked sense of humor, best known as gallows humor. An example of which is provided below.
Lenny Bruce once said that all his life all he ever heard from gentiles is "The Jews killed Christ." Bruce said he never really believed it until, one year, he bought a house in Lake Ronkonkama, NY which is on Long Island. On the day he moved in, he went down to the basement to clean up. Behind an old bookcase he discovered a note. Bruce read it. It said, "I did it" and it was signed "Morty."
by Haman Jr. April 02, 2008
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