A vast network of data that is

40% pornography

30% cat pictures

19% creeps

10% advertisements

10% the word "gay"

1% relevant information

All of which is spied on by the NSA
People keep saying that we should go back to the "Glory days" of the 1950's. But we can't; now we have the internet.
by Name removed by the NSA November 15, 2013
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A great place for insecure people
lets send mean things and mean comments about pointless videos and websites with the internet!
by mycowmoos:) January 16, 2011
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The net webbing inside of your bathing suit.
Paul: Have guys check out my internet!

Jon: Your too poor to have internet!

Paul: No, the internet in my swim trunks, asshole.
by Imammyself July 30, 2009
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A condition where one has an extreme obsession to be on the internet or be like people who they encounter on the internet. Similar to Text Talk.
1) Joe was diagnosed with internetitis after people recognized his habit of not leaving the computer for three days.

2) Steve was diagnosed with internetitis after people got tired of his internet speech, i.e. tl;dr, lol, ikr, idgaf, etc.
by Ilisten2Metal May 29, 2014
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1.) The only reason 99.9% of people bought a computer.
2.) The solution to everything.
3.) My only friend.
1.) If it weren't for the internet, I would've never spent $700 on this laptop.
2.) Horny? Hook up to the internet for some porn.
Too lazy to do / don't understand your homework? Look up the answers on the internet.
Procrastinating? Go on Youtube.
3.) Usually, people go out to have fun on Fridays after work. But me? I go on the Internet.
/forever alone
by foreveralonexoxo February 04, 2012
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George W Bush's name for the internet. It's mentioned in one of the other definitions on this page that his usage is correct. This is purely accidental. Coming from someone who was frighteningly intelligent and a brilliant orator, one might be tempted to give him the benefit of the doubt. But coming from someone who is profoundly unable to form sentences, say 'nuclear', ride bikes, ride Segways or eat pretzels, it's safe to assume that this is just another in a long line of oratorical train wrecks for poor old Bush Jr.
orig.: 'I hear there's rumors on the internets..'

contemp.: 'lol internets'
by frat curl June 23, 2005
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