"Did you see that girl over there?"-- random guy
"The blond one?"-- his girlfriend
"Yeah... it looks like she has herpesyphagonnalegs, those bumps dont look like they are supposed to be there"-- random guy ---*looks over at her legs*"Ewww!!! It does she looks nasty." his girlfriend

Wife: “Have you put the sheets out to dry and put the towels on?”
Husband: “Yes. You know I am a grown adult also used to live alone so you do not need to micro marrige me”