When you have a big shit that you've been holding in just poking out of your asshole
On the way back from the bar last night I had to shit so bad I had a head of the turtle
by Seabassroxursox May 22, 2017
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Taking a shit while wearing a thong. Possibly while drunk.
That chick I met at the bar last night was so drunk she squatted in the alley on the way back to my place and birthed a two headed turtle!
by Kuhtarl February 19, 2011
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The rare but real "talent" of taking not only an erect penis, but also the testicles in one's mouth while performing fellatio. Being able to deepthroat helps.
"That Cock Gobbling Ball Juggler's mouth was so big she could do the 3 headed turtle with ease."

Pornstars Annette Schwarz and Sasha Grey can do the turtle.
by e873 December 03, 2009
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a squating position with a semi erect penis and half extruded bowel movement
I was in the woods and had two headed turtle behind a tree/ I was laying in bed and showed my two headed turtle to the ol lady
by Bignz December 21, 2020
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Much like the big headed turtle, this term describes a big headed and small minded member of an older generation that is going extinct. The big headed turtle is a member of an older generation that has no interest in updating their knowledge of the world, only reads biased articles, belittles issues of millennials that he/she has never faced or researched, ferociously holds the baton on Facebook for insensitive propaganda, instigates and incites arguments for joy, does not know how to check sources for accuracy, and denies being racist/homophobic/sexist while supporting racist/homophobic/sexist ideals. Enjoys, coincidentally, calling others bigots while in fact being a bigot.
This big headed turtle posted a picture of millennials crying, affected by the deaths in the Florida shooting, stating that millennials only problems are "getting offended and protesting ridiculous causes."

Thank goodness big headed turtles are going extinct. One told me he isn't racist, but will not hire African Americans because of "how they get."

My big headed boss turtle inappropriately grabbed me at a company party, then told me, "Men don't get assaulted, they get complimented or fired."
by lolweird February 24, 2018
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