A fasterbator went into an airplaine bathroom with a copy of Hustler. He came out 23 seconds later panting, sweat pouring down his face. He achieved a new record, and was scowled at by everyone as he walked back to his seat.

i had to fasterbate because my mom was in the next room

David: Well, my mom was coming home soon, but I was majorly horny... so I started Fasterbating.

Jim Bob: And...

David: 1 minute 30 seconds

Jim Bob: Nice

How dint he get caught by his mom, even though he was jerkin off? That's the trick, just Fasterbate

Man, the other day, I had like five minutes from the time my mom went down the street to get the mail til she came back up to help me get my stuff! I was fasterbating like a mother fucker!!

"David, why are you taking the laptop to the bathroom?"
"I'm just going to fasterbate, mom!"

Kyle: I'm gonna go fasterbate
Myself:....
Kyle: Fasterbation chubs.