Dude, you've got a Dell!

Becca is another victim of cheugy psyops. I saw the garbage truck take all her Ugg boots yesterday. She even removed “I LOVE The Office!” from all her dating profiles. She’s unrecognizable.

I called Dell for tech support and the phone rang in India. I had a hard time understanding the guy due to the lousy phone lines, but they still had parts in stock for my 10-year-old Optiplex.

I called HP for tech support and the phone rang in India. I had a hard time understanding the guy due to the lousy phone lines, and he told me they don't support or have parts for my computer anymore, even though it's only 6 months old.

I called Compaq for tech support and the phone rang in India. I had a hard time understanding the guy due to the lousy phone lines, but I finally found out it was the same guy I was talking to at HP.

I called Emachines for tech support and I don't know where the phone rang, and I don't think the guy on the other end did either.

I called Packard Bell for support and found out that they don't do business in the United States any more. Well, I needed a new boat anchor anyway.

I called Micron for tech support and the phone rang at an ice cream shop in Peoria.

I called the largest electronics outsourcers in Malaysia and China, and found out that they make all the parts for all the computers of all brands.

Don't like your Dell? Don't blame your neighbor for the bad parts. They took away his job and gave it to some poor guy in India for 20 rupees a week. Do you really expect someone who's making 15 cents an hour to give a shit about what he's building?

ALL MASS PRODUCED COMPUTERS ARE THE SAME. THEY ALL BREAK. IF YOUR COMPUTER NEVER BREAKS, YOU HAVEN'T OWNED IT LONG ENOUGH. GET OVER IT.

I called Dell for a new Harddisk when my laptop died on me, after a 45minute phone call to someone from India i was told "OK, your laptop is not suppose to do that" (Would i be phoning if it was?). However rather than being sent a replacement harddisk i was sent new memory, phoned back, got sent a new DVD ROM drive, so phoned back again and an engineer was sent out and replaced every single part except the laptop case and harddisk. Finally after 4 weeks i recieved my harddisk.

"My computer's a dell, and my TV's delled."

"Call the repairman for both."

"That is a big pile of Dell"
"That Dell stinks"