A checkfest is a series of insults traded between two people or two groops of people. The purpose of such a competition is to prove that one person or group is more dominant than the other. A checkfest can be spoken in verse, if the check masters are talented enough, but the common check master lacks the skill to diss in verse. When the competition has begun, it is appropriate for one exclusive person to shout "CHECKFEST!!!"

The two states of being are as a human being, or a hungry ghost. Semi-regularly you need to ask yourself which you are. Sometimes it is human. Others, alas, it is hungry ghost.

The hungry ghost seeks validity outside of themselves. Someone pining for an indifferent ex is a hungry ghost. Someone who arrives alone at 6:30 on Saturday night to a pub is probably a hungry ghost. Obsessive checking of mobile phones, chat sites or networks are clear signs that one is a hungry ghost.

The best thing to do is just stay home and ride it out. Read a book. Find some good clean fun.