Sammy's from Mississippi and grew up on a farm.
He didn't have any friends...let alone female ones.

One day he swore he saw Betty the Cow wink at him.

Next thing you know...Sammy is showing Betty how to straddle herself without getting hurt.

Dan: bro why have you been staring into space for the last hour doing nothing?
Me: bro i have a chronic cringe from what happened earlier I can't concentrate

Joe: "My iphone is so useful, it's a f*cking beastility!"

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Alex: "Jackson is so good at killing people in Call of Duty"
Luke: "He's a beastility!"