Also known as the shocker, this phrase describes a sexual act in which the index finger is inserted into a woman's vagina and the pinky on the same hand is inserted into the anus. When the thumb is then used to stimulate the clitoris, this act is known as the "Yukon picklefork with a courtesy windsheild wiper".

The two states of being are as a human being, or a hungry ghost. Semi-regularly you need to ask yourself which you are. Sometimes it is human. Others, alas, it is hungry ghost.

The hungry ghost seeks validity outside of themselves. Someone pining for an indifferent ex is a hungry ghost. Someone who arrives alone at 6:30 on Saturday night to a pub is probably a hungry ghost. Obsessive checking of mobile phones, chat sites or networks are clear signs that one is a hungry ghost.

The best thing to do is just stay home and ride it out. Read a book. Find some good clean fun.