The practice of going through emails while on the shitter.

It’s an acronym standing for Can’t Remember A Fucking Thing. It’s usually used to describe embarrassment at being unable to remember someone (CRAFT moment); going onstage as the lead in the latest theatrical performance and your mind goes completely blank (CRAFT situation); the next morning after a night when you got pissed as a fart and woke up in bed cuddling a traffic cone and a string of fairy lights wound round your prick.

Wipe and type is when you're typing on the laptop, then you wipe your hind quarters and continue typing. This is a very frowned upon practice, as it spreads bacteria and foul odors.