A method for getting rid of crabs. First, you must shave everything from your neck down to your knees except for one testicle. Wait for roughly 24 hours before starting the next phase. After completing that you will get a bucket of ice water, a strip of cellophane, lighter fluid, and a lighter. Wrap you penis in the cellophane and then apply the lighter fluid to the unshaven testicle. Straddle yourself over the bucket of water (have it decently close to your testicle) and ignite your testicle. After no more than 5 seconds you will squat down until your testicle is fully submerged and the fire is out. At this point remove the cellophane from your penis and check for any burns.

Excellent work, you are now crab free.

The act of extreme masturbation. You must "knock one out" whilst in close proximity to any of the following; Your mum, a nun, your boss, a member of parliament, George Michael. A person with capabilities to act upon catching you mid self-abuse obvisouly ups the ante. Ejaculation must be reached before your danger wank target comes (no pun intended) to investigate. The higher the chances of being discovered with one's pants down, pulling one's war face is obviously where the danger comes from. The more danger involved the harder (or softer) it is to complete the task in hand (snigger). The more dangerous the better. The chance of being arrested, pummeled by an angry father or having your hand severed by an arab's sabre means that you are a pro "Danger wanker."